No pain meds yet today. I’m supposed to check in with the Dr. if the ear is not any better by tomorrow - so I thought I might should feel the FULL effects of the pain so I can tell for sure. Yeah - It still hurts like hell. I mean - HELL. So - I thought I’d try some homeopathic solutions. On my lunch break I bought:
“Similasan: Ear Wax Removal. Removes Wax, Cleans Ear”
I thought - It cant hurt. My ear feels so clogged so what the hell. Well - guess what else it says on the box.
“FOR USE IN THE EAR ONLY”
In all caps. What the Hell? Where else do YOU need ear wax removed from? I mean - I can see it now:
“Honey - it says we can only use this on our EARS. So we’ll have to get the EAR WAX out of our ASS some other way”
What the hell? Please tell me there is no other place that needs ear wax removal other than your ears. If there is? I dont want to know.
The other thing I purchased is this:
“Similasan: Earache Relief. Relieves pain, soothes and calms”
Calms. Says so on the box. I am thinking I might need several doses of the “Calms” and only one or two of the “Relieves Pain”. Oh - and this one doesnt specifiy that I HAVE to use it in my EAR only - so I am going to go drop a few drops in my eye balls and maybe rub some of on my ass just for kicks.
Stupid Labels. This shit better work.
Does your ass need a little calmness? What about your temples? You could just massage some of that stuff in!
Calmness in a box? What, are they marketing it as an ear treatment just to prevent riots and mass hysteria??
Wow, I don’t think I want to see a product made for ass wax, or for that fact actual ass wax.
The sad thing is, is that you know someone, somewhere would use it wrong if they weren’t warned. Heck, even with the warning you know someone is going to screw it up. Oh well, at least this way they won’t be able to sue the company.
My sister nearly lit my head on fire with the cone things for ear wax removal! Dang. Oh it’s wonderful stuff for waxing the butt!
I hope you feel better soon! I know you have got to feel so miserable. Hang in there!
playing with the ear wax can be tricky business. were you there when we all put those beeswax cone-candle things in our ears and lit them? there were definitely casualties . . . proceed with caution.
and can finally see the new design in all its glory - pretty cool mrs. zoot
Loving the new design, Zoot!
I have to agree with Krispy that the “ear candles” are interesting. They are both slightly effective and particularly disgusting! Plus, you have to use a bunch of them at once…BUT rather than just ear wax they do pull out the moisture that is trapped within your ear. So, if that is what hurts, it might be a good idea!
I’m trying to think of an answer for your journal entry…it might be a while!
How are your feet? Maybe you need to calm a few bunions. Your elbows? Mybe it will get rid of those dry patches….think I will stop there.
it’s like the warning label on superman underoos. “does not cause wearer to be able to fly”. fo’ real. my favorite is the warning on hair dryers…..”do not use while asleep”. roflmao!
Poor girl, feel better soon!
Ear pain? Oh I hear you girl. As a swimmer, my life’s been a constant earache since I was 5.