So, a little background.
I just met most of MrZ’s family last year in Slidell. This Christmas gathering was still the first time for meeting some of them. He has a HUGE family. In other words? I’m still very nervous around most of them.
Now, I have been expecting my period to start soon because it is about the time it started after I had LilZ. I decided to carry some tampons with me to Christmas dinner so that I wouldn’t have any embarrassing moments where I started my period surrounded by MrZ’s family.
I decided to go to the bathroom and take care of business. The bathroom was right off of the kitchen where everyone was gathered. And by “everyone” I mean about 20 of the 40 or so people were crammed in the kitchen. About five people were crammed in the hallway outside the bathroom. Everyone was just chatting and helping getting the food ready.
I made my way through the crowd to get to the bathroom. I was in the bathroom when I opened my purse to get out a tampon. I was trying my best to do it quietly because I didn’t want the aunts and uncles outside the bathroom hearing me dig around my purse.
(I know. I know. I’m a grown woman, I shouldn’t still be embarrassed about my period, but I am. Shut it.)
And what happened next? I dropped my purse and a tampon fell out and SLID UNDER THE DOOR OUT INTO THE HALL WHERE THE CROWD OF PEOPLE WERE SECONDS AGO.
I said, “SHIT.”
And then I just started running water and washing my hands trying to decide my next plan of action. Part of me was hoping someone would just kick it back under. Did anyone notice it? Was it sitting by their feet at that moment? What would I do when I opened the door? Bend down and pick it up? Is there a way to do that without the person two inches from you noticing? And if they notice…is there an appropriate joke to make to ease the embarrassment of the situation? Would I ever be able to look at them again? EEK.
I opened the door and the hallway was cleared and no one was in the kitchen.
(now you hear my sigh of relief)
They had all started gathering in the other room for pictures by the tree. As far as I know…my tampon incident occurred with only MY knowledge. Who knows…maybe the tampon made them all scatter…but I’m fairly certain I escaped humiliation for that moment. I walked out into the hall, saw my tampon, picked it up and shoved it in my pocket acting as though nothing had happened.
I’m smooth like butter.
who has doors that far from the floor?
I once had tamponS (plural!!) slip out of the hole at the bottom of my purse while walking in Toronto on Bay st. A very business looking business man picked up about 3 of them before realizing what they were…he then SHOVED them at me (appalled) and muttered “you dropped these” and I (oblivious) gaped at him like…what the hell? Free tampons on bay st? HOO-RAY!
Yeah for nobody noticing! What did Mr. Z say when you told him the story? Was he properly horrified while containing a giggle?
I still try to hide my tampons too… Its one of the few things I try to keep private..LOL
That’s hilarious!! I love the “shit” part! I could so see that happening to me!
You should have told them that you were just in there making Christmas ornaments.
http://web.dbtech.net/~suncastl/angel.htm
I can soooo sympathize with that OMG I would be red as a beet. Let’s just say for sanity sake they had left the hallway before you dropped it lol.
Well, Zootsie, I guess I’d have either stayed in there til after New Year’s or tried to go out the window or attempted to flush myself down the pot to escape!
You did good!!
LOVE the cutie pix of that baby! Oh MY!
Back in the kidless days, I was in line at a bar, and when I went to get my ID…I dropped a big old surfboard maxi pad right on the floor at the bouncer’s feet. I about fell over!
LOL! What a great story. I’m like that too. I am so self concious about all that sort of female stuff. I even hate to talk about it with Hubby. I know call me weird, but well, what can I say?
When I was in high school, I knew someone who pulled out a tampon and almost used it as lip gloss in class before realising. lol
I have a horrible story like that…we had workmen doing work on our house, and I used the downstairs bathroom. Our windows aren’t clear glass, but you can see things through them. The window is behind our toilet. Anyway I heard noises after I’d been sitting there, and I turned around to see the workman painting the house JUST ABOVE that window. I didn’t know what to do, I could see him pretty well, so could he see me? I didn’t know whether to hide and not move until he left, or make a run for it. *sigh*
I am like you…still not ready to talk openly about my period.
I am glad you survived.
Egads. You know they saw it and all ran away.