Once upon a time, there was a clumsy girl named Zoot.
I was making NikkiZ’s bed Saturday morning as part of my ongoing effort to make everything pristine before I leave my family for a week. I was stretching the sheet across the matress and thinking, “Jeez…if I didn’t know any better, I’d say this sheet was too small for this mattress.” I guess they make sheets that fitted for cribs to decrease any risk of SIDS, or to make Moms increase their risk of personal injury. I’m not sure which.
So, I was stretching the last corner of the sheet trying to fit it over the last corner of the mattress when – Pop! – the sheet napped out of my grasp allowing the force at which I was fulling to be redirected as my hand flew back and I punched myself in the mouth. I’m telling you – I was pulling that sheet hard – so I punched myself with quite a substantial amount of force. I immediately dropped to the floor with my hands over my face as tears immediately started streaming down my face. Of course, NikkiZ thought I was playing and started jumping all over my back and squealing as my lip started swelling to the size of a basketball.
(That might be a slight exaggeration.)
What was the first thing I did – get ice? No. Look in the mirror to check the damage? No. Go wake up MrZ and show him the results of my grace? Yes! He was quite impressed and might have fallen in love with me all over again as he was so overwhelmed by my charm and dignity.
By Sunday the swelling was gone – but my fear of cribsheets will be here for years.
so you knocked some sense into yourself did ya?
(oh that was bad. just bad)
Ouch! My lip hurts just reading about that. I’m glad you’re better (dignity, aside).
Been there, done that. Being clumsy’s fun, ain’t it? It’s only natural to want to show off the results.
Those crib sheets are evil, I tell ya! I’ve lost many a fight with a crib sheet.
Oh, yeah. We are the clumsy queens. I was loading the dishwasher the other night and managed to cut the back of my finger wide open on a knife that was in the basket. I thought “Ow, that kinda hurt” and then saw the blood flowing. Sigh.
I freaking HATE putting fitted sheets on beds, especially the top bunk bed which requires that I actually climb that tiny ladder and then fling myself over the mattress to reach the corner. It’s not pretty, I tell ya.
Here’s my story about being clumsy-about two years ago, I was trying to get the kids’ wagon out of the garage, and there was a box sitting on the handle of the wagon. So I pulled the wagon as hard as I could, and the handle flipped up and popped me right in the lip. Split my lip right open! That’ll teach me to go outside.
I thought I was the only one who did that with sheets! I recently managed to tear off a nail when the sheet snapped my finger against the headboard. Ow oww owwww
It’s not just you. If there is a stupid way for me to injure myself, I will find it and do it!
Washing my face one day, I felt like a was going to sneeze. I paused, remaining bent over the skin since my face was wet and lathered mid-wash. I sneezed and the force of it caused me to bust my lip on the faucet.
My husband has just had to face the fact that he’s married a big ol’ dork! (No offense to you!)
So you got pictures at the peak of the swelling, right? I mean, telling us about it is fine, but to REALLY prove it, we need pictures girl!!
Yikes! Glad you are feeling better!
I am so clumsy I trip up the stairs!
Ha, I LOVE those stories! I hope you’re okay! My favourite story was the time my boyfriend and I were play fighting and he went to punch me in the arm (which was in front of my face) and I moved it at the last second so he ended up punching me in the mouth and split my lip. It was totally awesome because I got to tell everyone at work that my boyfriend was the one who split my lip, although of course I told them what happened afterwards.Heh.