My friend Stace and I were talking the other night about moments in our lives as adults when we’ve felt stupid. Either by allowing words to come out of our mouths before we could stop them (like the time I exclaimed, “New Orleans is a big state!”) or the times the words the come out of our mouths are mispronounced and someone points it out to us. Or my favorite, times when I use the wrong word entirely and don’t even realize it.
I do shit like this all the time, and I feel like it has made me quite the expert in the proper way to correct someone if you notice they make a mistake. I think that most of the times I’ve felt stupid in my adult life is when another adult corrects me using a bad technique that bruises my fragile ego. Like the time my husband, bless his heart, chose laughter as a way of alerting me to an error. LAUGHTER IS NEVER A GOOD CHOICE. Other things you should NOT do: Guffaw, Roll your eyes, or sigh dramatically.
We were discussing this because our kids come home once in awhile upset over feeling stupid about something. Saying or doing something that made them feel like someone was laughing at them. I’m not sure if it makes them feel better or worse when we share our own stories of humiliation. I think they feel better knowing that we lived past our incidents but they also get depressed realizing that being an adult doesn’t automatically make you smart.
But I sure do wish it did…
So, what are some of your “stupid” moments as an adult? I actually asked one time in a class in college if Canada was considered a country. In my defense…I don’t think I have a defense. I also failed a pop-quiz US Map test one time. I majored in Geography because it was a weak point in my life, not because I had any natural skill. I’ve also use several words incorrectly and had it pointed out to me in good ways (“Let’s look up the word together!”) and bad ways (“HAHAHAHAHAHA”). Among them: Literally, Ironically (I think I still use that word wrong), Oriental, and Assure. I often times also mix words up: Rapport and Repertoire, Eclectic and Eccentric being the most common. In general? I’m just a verbal dumbass.
Most of my moments of stupidity come from being a klutz, not from saying stupid things (although I do that, too). Let’s see… there was the time that I fell down an entire flight of stairs in a busy Boston “T” station. I broke my cell phone from landing on it!
I also once fell down while crossing the street. Just… fell down. For no explainable reason.
My personal favorite was when I was in college, rushing to get to a final, and tripped UP a flight of stairs while holding a full cup of coffee. I slammed into a wall at the top of the stairs and exploded the cup of coffee all. over. me. And then went to my final smelling (and looking!) like I had showered in a vat of java. Fun.
Oh I have lots of them but the one that comes to mind was actually a joke. My ex and I were at a Nascar race and Collen Powell was there. They showed him on the big screen and the lights washed him out A LOT. So I jokingly said “I always thought Collen was black.” My ex told EVERYONE about how his wife thought Collen Powell was white.
last weekend i was, ahem, overserved with wine and busted out to a (new) friend that my husband and i had great sex. yeah, not a proud moment. sadly, i was so overserved that i don’t remember the whole conversation.
Thanks for the reminder and I apologize again.
Oh – no one should take this as directed at anyone! IT was just something funny we were talking about. I actually like it when people correct me because for every time ONE person tells me I used a word wrong, I probably used it wrong 20 times before an everyone just laughed when I walked away! hehe.
I like that you mix up eclectic and eccentric…cause I think those of us that have eclectic tastes can also be somewhat eccentric
Two of the most embarrassing things I can remember involved my cousin, Dickie, now deceased. One was when I realized that a mustache was actually hair that grew on a man’s lip, and didn’t cascade from his nose…(snort) and the second was when I saw water coming out of a “hole” in a boat and thought it was sinking…and Dickie laughed at me and said that’s how boats get rid of excess water. D’oh…like I’d know that!
When I was about 18, somebody was talking about Munich and I said it was in Austria. Of course, everybody killed themselves laughing. 3 years later, I moved to Munich
One time I said, “I really want to go to New York. I’ve always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower.”
In the beginning of my college football education, my boyfriend asked me if I knew what a wide receiver was, to which I responded:
“Are they the ones who throw?”
Um. No.
And this was in the day when any stupidity of mine was displayed in my friends’ AIM profiles. What can you do.
I have many stupid moments. I can’t remember all of them. I oftne talk quickly and things just fly out of my mouth!
Just the other day someone asked me how I ended up with all girls. I said I don’t know, my sisters got all the boys except one who got one of each. HERE IS WHAT I SAID WITH BRILLIANCE “But she did two dads” Then I tried to recover with, “I mean, her first husband passed away.” I just walked away hoping they knew what I meant. It was awful. I can’t even tell my other sister-although I know the sister that heard it probably already has!!
In Dutch i don’t make many mistakes, the result of 2 parents that are teachers and used to correct me every time i made a mistake as a child. This made me feel stupid in two ways. One was them correcting me, another one was me knowing (and using) words that other childs didn’t know and them laughing at me because i used difficult words (although they were the correct ones).
In written english (and of course spoken too, but i hardly ever do that) i make a lot of mistakes, often using words that sound the same but are written differently. Of course i can’t think of any words now…
were, where, now, know etc.
I once told a group of friends — fellow English majors — that my parents teached English. I was horrified. Still am. *twitch*
[...] 8th, 2007 Picture me hitting my forehead with the inside of my hand. Miss Zoot inspired me to confess stupid things I’ve said or done over the years. This should be [...]
I’m quite sure I say silly things but the one that comes to mind is something my sister said. She is notorious for saying the most stupid things sometimes! She sad thing is she really is smart so it’s really bizarre when she does it. Example:
She worked for Merrill Lynch in Fort Worth, TX. My husband called her at work one day. (An unususal occurance) My sister said, “How did you get this number?” After a pause, my husband, “Ummmm….directory assistance?!” She was truly baffled as to how he reached her at work!
When I take my dogs for a walk, I carry plastic baggies in my pocket to pick up their poop. One morning at work someone inquired about something (a baggie) sticking out of my pocket. I replied, “Oh. That’s a rubber. I always carry them when I walk my dogs.”
You were right – New Orleans is a big state -all to itself – just ask anyone in the rest of Louisiana
I’m not sure if I can explain this “moment” very well; it may be one of those you had to be there for, but I’ll try.
I went to work one morning and there was a box in the hallway with some important looking computer parts/thingies (technical term, huh?) in it. It had somebody’s name on it that sounded vaguely familiar, so I scooped it up and brought it inside. My office manager came in and asked what it was and I said “Its some kind of computer parts or something someone left in the hall for somebody….a Mr. Rash…? Isnt there somebody named Rash that works in this building? It says “T. Rash”…Isnt there a Tim? Tim Rash that works here…?”
Yeah I got that same blank stare from her too.
She said “Amy….. It. says. ‘TRASH’.”
It was old toner cartridges and yes, the box said “TRASH”, with a strategically spaced T & R and (teeny-tiny) ink blot between the two letters. I swear there was a dot there. And, there WAS a guy with the last name RAST who worked there….sooooo.
Ok I give up. I was stupid.
And then there was the time I referred a patient to a gynecologist for “crooked hole syndrome” but thats probably for another comment section.
I’m loving Bonnie’s comment!
At work a couple of days ago (I work at an acute care psychiatric hospital with pediatric patients), this is what I said to a few boys that were acting up, “Do I need to separate ya’ll so you can sit… separately?”
Yeah, true moment of brilliance. Luckily, the kids didn’t notice. Only another therapist.
I did the rapport/repertoire thing yesterday.
OMG. I’m the worst. Last time I was in LA (In Jan) I was lucky enough to get invited to the table of one of my 3 most favouritest singers EVER at a bar. (Sebastian Bach from Skid Row). We drank and talked for hours as a group, and him and my friend (who invited me over) were talking about how they were both from New Jersey and I wasn’t paying attention. They were listing bars they used to frequent, and they mentioned some bar called New Orleans (I think) and I was like “Man! Last time I was in New Orleans, I got SO drunk!” and Sebastian looked at me weird and goes “You’ve been to New Jersey?” Um, no. Shut up now. I even got really drunk later and called him out on being rude to some fans behind their backs, which I am KICKING myself for now, because everyone knows that Sebastian has one of the worst tempers of anyone in the music business. Luckily he was nice to me, and he even called me “honey doll” but I keep cringing thinking back on what he could have said to me. Also, he left pretty soon after that, and I feel bad because he probably thinks I’m an idiot and I never got to apologise. PLUS, I understand his reasoning now, because those fans WERE just trying to use him to listen to their CD. I had no idea what I was talking about. *kick*
Anyway, I still cringe thinking back on how badly that night could have gone.
Oh, and once I wore a white skirt with a pink top to a wedding. It doesn’t sound THAT bad, but I was the paid entertainment (violinist) at the time. I have no idea what I was thinking,a nd I didn’t click until afterwards how bad it was. Normally we wear black, and this one was an outdoor wedding and I was playing by myself and it didn’t seem right to wear black, but I didn’t CLICK onto what I was actually wearing.
Man, I could list these all day.