It’s really hard to tell, right now, what personality traits NikkiZ may have inherited from MrZ or I. But there are parts of my own personality I feel like I’m trying to nurture in her. I think I’m mildly scared of the possibility of her being a frilly girly-girl, so I like to encourage her to play outside. With the bugs and the dirt. I try to avoid pink, if I can, and I avoid buying her any clothing with princesses on it. I don’t know if that is a “proper” thing to do, as a parent. Actually – I’m fairly certain it goes against most of my “Be Who You Want” methods. But the fear of her being something I can’t relate to is so strong I steer her in any direction other than that one.
I wouldn’t even let her look at the glittery gowns in the Halloween Costume section. I was pointing out the Monkeys! and Ducks! and Pablo! No Fairies. No princesses. No dancers.
I don’t know why this is such a concern for me. You’d think I was trying to keep her from voting republican, I’m so insistent. My Mom bought her some Spider Man sippy-cups which she loves, and I tried my best to use that to encourage her to choose a Spiderman backpack. But no – she wanted the ones with the Disney Princesses on them. We finally settled on some characters from some pre-school show we don’t watch, but she really wanted the one with Cinderella. Why did I keep her from that? I’m evil. And I’m not even sure why.
With my luck, it’s all going to backfire on me and she’ll end up wearing a tiara until she’s 35.
I don’t know I think you’re just going to have to let her be who she is and accept that girls are predestined to be the opposite of what people try to make them. My sister- in-law’s mom is very frilly, glittery, dresses and jewelry and the whole she bang and my sister-in-law is not like that so when she had a daughter she wouldn’t buy her dresses and we all knew she was against the girly girly thing so we didn’t buy her dresses and lo and behold as soon as she turned about 2 and a half she won’t wear anything else. She wants princess everything and dresses and jewelry. Sometimes ya just can’t fight it.
Ok now. What if your mom pushed the girly stuff on you? Or worse yet…what if your mom and dad were haters of all thing Office Depot??? Hmmmmm?
LOL!! You’re not weird or strange at all. We all encourage our kids o do things we like or are comfortable with.
Ya know what else… You’re an awesome lady Zoot. If you’re daughter turns out just like you…that’s awesome. She’ll be a wonderful person too then. That’s something to be proud of!!
I don’t encourage Princesses Or Barbies either. She’s only just now stating a preference, so I saw no point in conditioning her to like those things. BUT, sometimes she does want them, so when we give her a choice, and she chooses princess stuff, i suck it up and let her have it. No barbies yet, fortunately
(for the record, I loved all that stuff as a girl)
I had to comment just to say that I LOVE that photo!!
I’m anti-pink, but she likes it anyway, but she’s not insistent on it thank goodness. I’m also anti-Barney. Whenever we see him, I tell her Barney is yucky. She doesn’t want to dress up as a princess for Halloween, though, she wants to be Elmo. *sigh*
I have the same fears. I have a no Disney Princess rule at my house. But then I also a no transformers rule too. For her birthday A got a Pretty Pony. It’s her second one. Her brother, nearly four, was so excited because no there were two! they could play together! He poured over over the marketing material from the package and chose which one he’d like for *his* birthday. So, yes, my 4yo son will get a Pretty Pony for his birthday, and he will love it.
What does this have to do with NikkiZ? As it turns out, very little
But kids will like what they like.
Don’t feel bad. I REFUSE to buy those horrid shoes that light up when they walk. I can’t help it. I think they are butt ugly.
She still looks girly to me. Such a sweet baby face.
I also forgot to mention both the boys love of purses. I think it is just a stage.
dude. Chill. My little man chooses the Disney Princesses everytime…i’m totally not freakin…yet.
I’ve got a friend that is a Barbie Hater and she totally looks down on me for allowing Barbie in my house. The last birthday party we both went to I gave the little girl a Barbie Farie. Not Barbie and it doesn’t look like her at all. It made me a little happy inside to see her face when the little girl opened the package up.
Hate aside, little girls need to be rounded. You have to teach them how to catch frogs so they can chase little boys with them.
I don’t think she’ll ever be anything you can’t relate to.
Girl, you have the most beautiful hair!!!
BTW we have princess paraphernalia all over the house. I’m swimmin in princess. Bad thing is my oldest daugher always makes my middle daughter be the king. Do you think she’s gonna have a complex?
I was a frilly girl child. These days, I’ve had to resort to having “Skirt Friday” just to convince people that I’m not butch.
I still think it is a stage. All children go through it.
Wait a few years, she could decide to wear that tiara, or she could totally go the other way.
Ya never know!
And? Why have my comments changed colors?
I was a lovely pink color when I started out. And now? I am grey.
Me no likey.
And now I am back to pink.
WEIRD.
That is an awesome picture – good catch on LilZ’s part. And I have no idea if Nikki will be a girly girl or a tomboy, but I know that no matter what, you’ll find a way to be as wonderful of a mom to her as you have been to LilZ, and neither of them will *ever* have to doubt if they are loved.
Great shot, LilZ!
I can’t stand princesses, but I love that picture!
I love that picture. I’m afraid I’m going to be like that if I have a daughter, too. Princesses, NOOOOOO! Be careful about it backfiring though.
Baby elbows! Great shot, Lil Z.
LOVE THAT PICTURE.
(I would be tempted to make it black and white.)
I would be the EXACT same way.
I watch football and baseball and wouldn’t know what to do with girly-girl things.
We all watch football together too and the Barbie’s help us catch the football.
My aunt was recently telling me something along these same lines. She said she was always so worried her girls would grow and want to wear fancy clothes and make-up. Things that my aunt knew nothing about. Well, her oldest daughter is 20 and is in cosmotology school. So yeah, she ended up not like my aunt at all. But it has worked out just fine and they still relate to each other. I guess it just boils down to being good friends and loving each other. Even if we aren’t similar.
Beautiful post. And beautiful picture. Thanks for sharing.
Cute picture! I think you should just let her be who she is. If she likes barbies, princesses and fairies…so what? That certainly doesn’t mean she’ll turn into a Republican. I liked all those things and I’m the farthest thing from a Republican LOL!
This kind of reminds me of my mom and I. She is so not a girly girl, and from the moment I could do things for myself I got into my grandma’s makeup (my mom doesn’t wear any), put on any jewelery I could find, and refused to wear any shoes that weren’t black patent leather mary janes. I’m pretty much the epitome of a girly girl, as is my sister, and my mom has dealt with it just fine.
I do not at all think you are weird. Sadly, I think we live in a society that teaches girls that being a princess is a lofty goal. Thus, I am much like you. I avoid pink as much as I can. I don’t allow princesses or Barbies in our home. My girls are 3 and despite my attempts at keeping them naive to the ways of Disney, it seems inevitable. Those faces are plastered all over the place. It feels like I am constantly fighting an uphill battle.
I also have a boy who is almost 2. I allow him to do everything the girls do. So if we own a pink sweater, he tends to get to wear it too. I am often criticized, but it is just a color, right? It doesn’t really mean anything.
I think that as parents we can encourage and lead them in the direction of our choosing, but in the end they ultimately make all the decisions (with our molding helping them along the way, we hope).
So what you are saying is that this
http://www.flickr.com/photos/melizard/274846024/in/set-72157594337407976
would be your biggest nightmare?
Seriously though I was just thinking about this same thing, but in the opposite direction last night as I went through pictures. After reading your post on the subject, I wrote one of my own.
LOVE that pic so much!!!
I wanted a boy but had a girl and I can totally relate. It’s hard to find the nice happy medium.
I also just wanted to say your grass/yard (or whoever’s house your at) is SO FLIPPIN’ BEAUTIFUL! Ours is fried!
My oldest (now 16) loved dressing up in pink. dresses, frilly over-the-top girly-girl attire when she was little. She was so excited about starting kindergarten to have new people to dress up for and I was cringing inside. She even wore her Cinderella costume to school one day.
Then the tide turned – she wouldn’ t wear any pink, nothing flowered, no skirts/dresses, etc. for several years.
Thankfully, the pendulum seems to have settled on a a middle ground, she dresses up when it’s appropriate but has no problem with jeans and t-shirts to hang around in.
I’m sure Nikki will find her middle ground too, partially by your influence and partially by the taste she develops by trial and error. My only piece of advice would be to not make girly the ‘forbidden fruit’.
Well you could look at it without fear. It could be one of those things that you learn about through her. I teach my mom about makeup and stuff all the time. I even had to teach her about shaving her legs with a razor because she had an electric one all her life. There will inevitably be things that she likes that you weren’t into, but it can bring you closer together. Plus, awesome pic!
Yay for weirdness! I love that photo.