I haven’t had a lot of free time to blog (go figure) the last few days as I’m trying to either (a) Keep everyone in my family alive, a task that is much harder than I anticipated, or (b) Catch up on sleep by forcing the kids to nap with me. AndyZ is a much better sleeper than his sister was, but I’m feeling more tired because I can’t sleep as much during the day as I did with her. The nights were impossible with her, but since it was just her during the day, I could stay caught up relatively easily. The nights are easier, but still not long enough with AndyZ. But I can’t nap as much during the day because his evil sister thwarts all of my attempts. Like today – she slept for 30 minutes at naptime. THIRTY MINUTES. That’s not even enough for me to fall asleep, much less clock in any catch up time.
However, I have been trying to upload at least a few new pictures to flickr every day. For those of you not keeping tabs on my new flickr photos, I thought I’d add a few of my favorites here for you to see. AndyZ is still a grumpy old man and NikkiZ is still active and adorable. In case you were wondering…
So, my daughter is adjusting well. Several have asked if there’s any jealousy issues, and I say there’s no way because she just adores him too much. And she’s not regressing or anything (yet?) wanting to be more like a baby. However, she is demanding a lot more attention by crying over Every. Little. Tragedy. That. Invades. Her. Life. Like running out of milk. Or a Dora episode ending.
But other than that? She’s actually doing waaaay better than I expected. She seems okay with the fact that I can’t carry her around like I used to do, although it is breaking my heart not to be able to. She asks 100 times a day to hold “Baby AndyZ” and would hold him all day, even while he’s crying, if we’d let her. She’s constantly trying to tell us how to parent him: Take him outside, Daddy. That will make him feel better. And she loves providing commentary to guests about his eating habits: He drinks the milk out of Mommy’s boobies. My boobies don’t have milk.
She has also developed a few other adorable habits not related to her new brother. She is using the word “Actually” constantly. She uses it correctly, although a little too liberally. It is so cute because she over-pronounces it so it sounds very much like an over-educated adult trying to snob it out for her elite friends.
She seems to have inherited our love of Geography and an intense spatial awareness as she asks where everything is as we’re going there. She’s looking for statements like, “It’s by Target.” Or, “It’s on the other side of town, near Daddy’s work.” She must understand where each destination is in relation to other places she frequents. She even sometimes points out where we would go if we were heading someplace else. “Target is that way.” Or, “Scout lives over there.”
She also just seems SO big now. So grown up and mature and no longer my baby. I guess it’s because I have a real baby now, but it’s very weird seeing her appear giant-like next to her new brother. She always seemed so tiny to me before. Now she’s my big girl. Helping Momma take care of the baby. Doing things like cleaning off his pacifier by dipping it in her cereal milk. I’d be lost without her.
Sometimes I write blog entries and casually mention things that I forget to re-visit later with in more detail. For example: The last entry referencing my daughter’s near-death incident.
NikkiZ and I were on the couch this morning, and I was nursing AndyZ. I had just put down our plates of biscuits on the coffee table and we were going to eat breakfast while watching Bee Movie. NikkiZ reached forward for a biscuit and lost her balance falling FULL FORCE onto the coffee table. Cracking her forehead on the edge of the table with a terrible crack and then fell to the floor. The way she collapsed combined with the lack of a scream had me immediately think she had knocked herself out. Panic took over and reason went out the window and I reached down and grabbed her off the floor in one arm while still holding her nursing brother in the other. I ran to the kitchen with both kids in my arms to grab some ice.
Luckily – in the seconds that it took me to run to the kitchen – NikkiZ started screaming which eased my mind to millionth degree. But then it hit me: I just picked up my toddler one week post-op. Probably not the smartest move.
NikkiZ had a horrible bruise and bump pop up almost immediately on her head, but if I said it was the first one of those she had gotten – I’d be lying. Hell, I’d be lying if I said it was only the tenth one. She is a tad bit accident prone – to say the least.
Anyway – all is fine now. She’ll be okay and I think I avoided any major damage to my wound. At least no vital organs have fallen out behind me as I’ve been walking today. So – I think I’m okay. Just one of those split second moments that scared the SHIT out of me.
And now you know…the rest of the story.
It’s been 7 days since I was sliced and diced and AndyZ introduced himself to our family. I will celebrate this with my favorite posting style: The Bulleted List.
How I’m Doing One Week Later
- Nursing is still painful, although the bleeding has stopped. I’m not crying when the latching begins, and as the feeding moment progresses I actually start to forget he’s even eating. Yay!
- I still have that 5-month pregnant belly going on which I hate because it’s round like a pregnant belly, making me still look pregnant. I’d rather just look fat at this point. Fat is easier to dress.
- My incision hurts a bit more today because we had a bad fall this morning and my maternal instinct kicked in and had me pick up my toddler (thinking she was dead after a BAD fall) while also holding my infant. Not smart looking back, but it was just a reflex. Lets hope I didn’t do any damage.
- I’m functioning at full capacity now, other than just being kinda tired. I’m doing most everything I did before…aside from lifting things too heavy for me. I’m feeling almost normal.
How AndyZ is Doing One Week Later
- This kid is a sucker. After two nights of sticking my boob in his mouth at every cry, I realized he was just wanting to SUCK and not hungry. So, we tried a pacifier yesterday and – BAM – worked like a charm. He loves it. We have decided to only use it at night though, in an effort to avoid to much of an attachment.
- He’s still seems like a grumpy old man and rarely seems content. I’m already worrying about him being a high-anxiety child. Since I tend to be a high-anxiety adult I’ve always assumed I’d one day have a kid like me, I’m starting to think AndyZ may be it.
- If he cries for no reason, all it takes is a step outside and he chills out. He loves being outside. We just sit out there and he just mellows. I love that about him because – as a family – we all love being outside. And it’s nice to have a good automatic cry reducer on hand. Especially one that doesn’t involve drugs.
- He hates baths. But don’t they all at this age?
I’m afraid my last post may have given the wrong impression of my recovery. It is actually going surprisingly well. Much quicker than with NikkiZ. Since I came home, I’ve kept up with most of my normal activity (laundry, cooking, etc.) just fine, I’m just doing it a little gingerly – I guess is the best way to put it. And I’m still only taking one pain pill a day. And I probably don’t even need that one, it’s just kinda my reward and a way to help me get comfortable to sleep at night. MrZ will even attest to how much better I’m doing this time around, although it’s pissing him off that I won’t just CHILL THE EFF OUT already, and SIT DOWN for chrissakes.
I’m also taking daily naps with both kids at one time. And let me tell you – that is the coolest thing ever. I love to sleep with my kids and now I have two of them! It’s actually quite awesome and today we all slept for almost two hours.
(Sidenote: As I am typing this, my son has been on a non-stop poop binge. Every few seconds I hear another of those glorious sounds coming from him in the bouncy seat. I’m hoping I’ll come up with a good “reason” that MrZ will need to change this diaper before I’m done writing the entry.)
(Note about the Sidenote: I am talking about AndyZ – by the way – not LilZ. Hee. I have two sons now.)
Anyway…I’m doing well. In reality? The toughest part is the nursing because AndyZ is FIENDISH with his sucking technique and is tearing my boobs UP. I wince and cry with feedings again like I did the first few weeks of nursing LilZ. My boobs are SO SORE. And bleeding! Gotta love bleeding nipples.
(Totally the name of my first death punk album, by the way: Bleeding Nipples.)