Automatic Smile Inducer

I took both kids to the doctor today. AndyZ because he was running a fever (turned out to be an ear infection) and NikkiZ because she needed a note to go back to school since she’s had a few instances of diarrhea in the last week. On the way back from the doctor, I called two people at work to explain that I got her note, I was taking her to school, and I’d be in shortly. After I got off the phone, NikkiZ took the doctor’s note while we were driving and put it to her ear like it was a phone. These are the two “calls” she made:

Jenni? It’s NikkiZ. Pause for response on the other end of the line
I just went to the doctor. Pause.
I have diarrhea. Pause.
I didn’t know either, but I have a coupon so it’s okay and I can go back to school.
*********
Steve? It’s NikkiZ. Pause.
I have diarrhea. Pause.
No, DIARRHEA. Steve evidently didn’t hear her the first time.
Yeah. Pause.
I got a coupon from the doctor so I can go back to school. Pause.

I have no idea why she was calling the note a coupon, and I don’t know why she wanted to call my boss and coworker to tell them about her diarrhea, but it was the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. If there has been one moment in her life I wish I could rewind to record later? That would be it. Best Fake Phone Call Award…HANDS DOWN.

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24 Responses

  1. Sarah Lena says:

    This made me laugh really hard. You know Jenni would’ve LOVED that call.

    Steve not so much.

  2. Heather says:

    Heh I’m sure they feel very loved and accepted that she wanted to include them in her gastrointestinal distress ;)

  3. Those phone calls made me giggle after a very stressful day of working for oh, about 14 hours now. (I intersperse blog reading with working so I don’t lose my mind).

    Is intersperse a word?

  4. Jenera says:

    This made me literally laugh out loud. Kids are so funny in some of the things they do.

  5. SupaCoo says:

    How funny!! What a great story.

  6. Katy says:

    Hahaha. She’s the funniest little thing.

  7. jessica says:

    OMG – DYING over here! (esp after reading the top post – more hugs) Espcially when she repeats to Steve that she has Diarreah. that’s comedic GOLD right there.

  8. Deb says:

    That is one of the cutest things I have ever heard! So funny – just what you need right now!

  9. cagey says:

    I LOVE Toddler Fake Phone Calls. Even better than Real Ones.

    I am really sorry about Cisco. I have lost lots of pets over the years and each one hurts. I feel ya, sister.

  10. Pocklock says:

    Oh that’s hilarious. I’m bookmarking this one to read whenever I get crabby!

  11. stacey says:

    that is funny. HA!

  12. Love it! And loving even more the thought of NikkiZ at, oh, age 13 or 16, reading this entry and saying, “Moooom, you told the Internet I had diarrhea?!?” LOL. :)

  13. Rhi says:

    This is the best thing I’ve ever read. Seriously.

    And, I’m afraid I’m going to have to leave work today, because I’m sniffly and I do not have a coupon that says I can be here.

  14. That, as we say in my house, is some funny shit.

    Between NikkiZ’s phone call and LilZ calling books his “new crack,” you’ve got some funny kids. It makes the sleepless nights and the being thrown up on all worth it, doesn’t it?

  15. Cat says:

    That is hilarious. Reminds me of my baby brother, who on his 3rd Christmas went around hugging everyone after opening each gift and saying, “Thank you, it’s JUST what I needed!” What?

  16. Snarky Mommy says:

    Hilarious! Yesterday Jack recited a conversation on his (non-working) cell phone that I had with my mom the day before about returning his snowpants and not having the receipt. Funny, but also made me realize I can no longer talk freely in front of him on the phone about people because he could tell them what I say!

  17. Dani says:

    That is flippin’ hilarioius. Love the tone and the pauses and how she yelled diarrhea when “Steve” didn’t hear it the first time.

    Cat – my cousin’s child did that one Christmas. He got a BBQ set and loudly exclaimd while shaking “I have always wanted that. How did you know?” Meanwhile, he had no idea what the heck it was.

  18. zandor says:

    That is hilarious and great.

  19. I laughed out loud. Best conversations ever! “I don’t know either, but I have a coupon so it’s OK.” LOVE IT.

  20. Rachael says:

    That is so funny! Where do they get that stuff?

  21. elena says:

    Completely awesome! That child is hilarious. My son is not much younger than she and I just cannot imagine him having the same depth to a “fake” conversation.

    Thanks for sharing. Loved it!

  22. Maria says:

    Perhaps, she was thinking about grocery coupons. Too cute.

  23. Courtney says:

    Too cute! And dude, it seems like EVERYBODY is getting ear infections these days… it’s making me jittery!

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