This Story Would Be Better If I Could Provide Audio

(And also? This will be one of the many entries my child will request I delete once she gets old enough to be embarrassed by such things.)

NikkiZ always seems to need to go potty when we’re in the weird public places we (a) Never go to and therefore don’t know where the bathrooms are or (b) Would rather not use the bathrooms at due to possibility of contamination. She’s potty-trained enough now to hold it for short periods of time, but this weekend? It wasn’t an option. We were at the civic center downtown to get tickets and we had walked there about 4 blocks from the van. So, asking her to hold it? Not really an option.

I hunted down a bathroom that had only three stalls, leaving only the handicap one open. I don’t like using the handicap bathroom if I can avoid it, but this was an emergency. I put NikkiZ on the toilet and she immediately started grunting (Me: Great.) and said, while grunting, “Mom. Go out there and wait.” Pointing to the door of the stall.

I informed her that I did not want to leave her in the stall by herself, she would just have to tolerate me being in there with her. So, while continuing to grrrrrunt she said, “Okay. Then…stand up all the way against the wall.”

Essentially? She was banishing me to the far end of the stall so she could have the privacy she needed while she pooped. And hearing a 3-year old try to order such a thing while pooping? Is quite funny. As the lady in the stall next to us indicated by laughing out loud.

Hearing the disembodied voice laughing from the stall next to us? Caught NikkiZ off guard. I don’t know if she’s ever really considered how easy it is to hear through the stalls. She said – still while grunting – “What’s that voice? What’s that laughing?” This, of course, cracked me up as I started just finding the whole situation hysterical. NikkiZ then started laughing – still while grunting – because she is physically unable to hear laughter and not respond in the same way. Even if she has no idea what’s funny. If you’re laughing? She will too, while trying her best to figure out what is so funny.

When she was done with the laughing and the pooping she said, “Heh. I’m funny, Mom. And lots of times pooping is funny too.”

Yes. Yes it is.

28 Comments

String on the Finger

Teacup

So, just for the record? My resolutions are not going so well. I feel like, overall, I’ve made about one step in the direction I’m wanting to go with my life. On step towards just being the better person that I so want to be. Which is still – you know – one step. So, I should be proud of that one step. But, the fact that I’m not moving faster means that the bad crap that happens because these changes haven’t been made? Because my priorities are still askew and my life is still unorganized and chaotic? Those annoying things are still happening.

LIKE…Let’s count how many things I’ve forgotten to do for my kids/family in the last week or so.

  • Return a report card signed to LilZ’s school. Which, for the record, was actually lost by me. So that’s worse than just forgetting to sign it. I actually lost it. And then had to write a note telling his school that I lost it. Which is uber-humiliating. I thought about trying to fake like it had been stolen, to make me feel less stupid, but LilZ seemed to think that would be obviously a lie.
  • Order chili for chili night at NikkiZ’s school which was last night. They were volunteering to cook dinner for us at the kids’ school, and I forgot! What the hell? Someone offers to make you dinner? You sure as hell better turn in the forms to actually get some prepared for your family. Instead, I had to cook. BAH.
  • Wipes. Wipes. Wipes. Do you know how many days I’ve forgotten to send wipes to my son’s daycare now? MANY MANY DAYS. If I don’t remember today I’ll be putting them in the awkward position of deciding what to wipe his butt with. Which is not an easy decision when you have a kid as sensitive-skinned as he is. MUST NOT FORGET WIPES.
  • Class choice forms for HIGH SCHOOL. Although, in my defense, I’m still a little bit in denial about the whole high school thing. I mean, LilZ’s not ready for high school yet, right? He’s only…like 12. Or 10. Or something, right?

My point? I need to try new techniques that allow me to organize my life in a way that – you know – actually helps me remember things. As opposed to just allowing me to purchase really cute To Do list pads of Etsy. Because, while cute? Completely useless if you think they’re too cute to actually write on.

24 Comments

Helping Everyone On The Interweb Make It Through This Monday

Face

I was checking a stylesheet change on my site this weekend when this picture showed up on my random photos bar at the top of the page. I had forgotten how often NikkiZ made the scrunch-y face. I’m glad to see her brother is doing his best to populate that tag in flickr as well.

I know I preach it all the time, but this is exactly why I want to make babies with flickr. Look how easily I was able to grab photos based on random tags I came up with to compare my kids. Of course, you have to be diligent about tagging photos for this to work. But if you do? Look at how quickly you can pull up photos of your children making awesome faces.

So, since today is Monday and these photos made me forget that for a moment? I’m showing my appreciation of flickr by sharing with you some more of the awesome photos of my daughter and her scrunchy face:

The technique

Blurry but hilarious
And who’s that kid holding her? He’s so young.

Look of EEEEVIL

You’re welcome.

17 Comments

Hot and Cold

DSC_0017

MrZ and I have entered that portion of the year where we spend our days coming in behind the other one to adjust the thermostat. He likes it warmer than I do. So, I lower the thermostat setting and he turns it up. And in between we argue with each other about how the other one should QUIT DOING THAT ALREADY. It’s like a really boring comedy routine.

I just do NOT like to be hot. And because I tend to dress warmer in the winter than he does, I get really hot in my sweaters and blue jeans inside the house. And that bugs me to death. I do NOT like walking around sweaty in my own home. The same goes for the summer time, where – if I didn’t have any concern for energy conservation – I’d leave the thermostat on 60 from May thru August. But – I do try to be a little conscious of the planet and the conservation of resources.

A little bit.

The weird thing about this part of my personality? The irritation with my house being too warm? Is that I’m just the opposite with my outdoor environment. If I didn’t love Huntsville so much, I’d move some place even warmer. I hate the winter with every ounce of my soul. And winter here? Is nothing compared to what some of you suffer through. We don’t even get snow anymore. Most of us don’t even own real winter coats. It just does not get cold enough to invest in that kind of outerwear. But for me? Still too cold. And I love the summer time. I love going to the Botanical Gardens and being outdoors even in the dead heat of the summer. Doesn’t really phase me.

As long as my car and my home are air-conditioned.

How weird is that? Inside? I prefer the cold. But outside? I prefer the hot.

It is official. I’m insane. In case the jury was still out on that one. Which I don’t think it was.

So – what about you? Does your indoor comfort level equal your outdoor comfort level? Or are you weird like me?

27 Comments

Silver Lining? Maybe?

DSC_0537

I’m trying to be more positive in my life – hoping that the universe will return the favor. However – this morning? Not so successful. Several things caused me stress and anxiety which had me in a grumpy tizzy bitching and grumbling and spewing negative energy to everyone in my family. I feel bad about this – but I still want to vent about what is causing me discord. That’s what the blog is for, right? So, I’m going to let you know the things pissing me off – but I’m going to try to do it in a positive tone. Let’s see if it can be done.

  • Ending LilZ’s birthday last night with a tension headache that wouldn’t go away was totally awesome. The great thing about headaches that won’t go away is that they force you to do a lot of squinting. Which is totally sexy. They also have you putting warm rags on your forehead which helps provide extra moisture to your skin. Moisture is great for helping skin stay wrinkle-free, you know.
  • AndyZ waking up constantly throughout the night to cough or sneeze was awesome because it allowed me to catch up on some TV! I actually was able to finish all of Lost. I was afraid I’d get behind – but luckily my sick kid remedied that. Even better? He only seemed to want to sleep in the upright position so I got to spend a good chunk of the night in the recliner! It’s been a long time since I’ve done that, I missed it!
  • You know what’s awesome about plumbing problems? It forces us to test our resourcefullness by sending LilZ to a friend’s house to shower and having MrZ boiling pots of water on the stove for a bath. These are the type of real-world lessons our children need to learn, and what better way to learn than by watching us face these challenges head on! And even better? The interesting variety of cursing such issues can inspire in us. When would AndyZ have heard the phrase “Son Of A…Donkey!” if I hadn’t been forced to take a cold shower yesterday!

The sarcasm was too strong for any of that to actually come off as “positive” wasn’t it? Oh, well. I tried.

16 Comments