The Sleeping Update
The sleeping. It is not any better. Luckily, the cuteness is still intoxicating.
We tried putting AndyZ in the crib once or twice recently, but he just screams bloody murder until we get him out. And while some parenting techniques walk you through letting babies cry a bit to see if they learn to self-sooth, none of those techniques actually allow the parents to sit on their asses on the couch in the living room watching the newest episodes of “True Beauty.” These techniques usually require someone make periodic trips to the wailing child to assist them in their quest for sleep.
I’m not sure if I’ve made it clear, but I’m lazy. So, our options are either A) Let him cry it out until he falls asleep or B) Let him sleep with us. We chose “B” because I have a guilt complex the size of Montana.
So, he sleeps with us and gets nursed every time he cries so that he’ll immediately go back to sleep.
I know what you’re thinking, I totally need to write a parenting book, don’t I? “Even Lazy People Can Be Parents!” What do you think?
I slept in NikkiZ’s bed for two hours last night, letting MrZ take over the AndyZ obligations for a bit so I could sleep. Those two hours were the best two hours of sleep I’ve had in weeks, months, years. And they were on a twin bed that has no box springs. That tells you how sleepy I was – so sleepy I could ignore the screams in agony from my spine.
So, we’re in the same square we’ve been in every time I’ve written about how tiny my stretches of sleep are every night. AndyZ is still sleeping with us. For 30-60 minute segments. At which point he cries, I give him the boob-cifier, and he and I both go back to sleep. Until the next wake-up wail 30 minutes later. The dark circles under my eyes go really well with the exhaustion-induced emotional instability and the stress-created acne. In other words? I’m a total hottie right now. TRUST ME.
We’re having sleeping issues too (my daughter is about a week or two younger than AndyZ), although not quite that serious. Her major issue is that she refuses to sleep in her crib after about 3 a.m., and definitely, every morning, after 5 a.m.
Well, there was that one night when she slept for 9 hours straight in her crib, but we’re counting that as a total fluke. It was a marvelous fluke though!
I’m heading out of town for business this week and am betting that she sleeps straight through the night when I’m not there. My husband is typically all types of lucky like that.
Well, if it makes any difference, he’s really stinking cute.
Sounds like a page from the book I should write. Wish I could offer some glimmer of home. I slept on the couch last night. Lil’bug was tossing and turning and H was snoring.
I agree with Rhi, too stinking cute!
And on this topic.. of “True Beauty”, not sleeping.. doesn’t Renee look like she was in a car wreck or had a stroke or something horrible like her face has been badly reconstructed?
Or is that just me?
Dang, that sucks. I wish I had some magic advice, but my kid slept like a log most of his babyhood (please don’t hit me!)
But, like you said, at least he is completely freakin’ adorable!
Oh yes. The sleep, it is so tough for babies. I will never be able to use the phrase “sleep like a baby” without irony again.
Hope it gets better for you soon… our girl is 11 months and most of the time I feel like it’s a crapshoot. We have no idea what we’re doing, it seems… we go with whatever works to get us all some sleep (aka your theory
How are you even able to tie shoes at this point? I thought I would die from exhaustion when Tessa quite sleeping through the night. She’s gone back to sleeping through the night again and I’m still exhausted but not like I was. I’m amazed that you can compose complete sentences. Go you.
Since I don’t have any kids, I can’t give any advice on the sleeping bit. AndyZ sure is a cutie!
As a pediatric nurse I can tell you that your “method” will never work LOL…may I suggest some reading for you…I assure you, it works EVERYTIME !!!! Let me know in about 2 weeks how wonderfully you are sleeping without waking during the night to feed…..
http://www.babycenter.com/0_the-ferber-method-demystified_7755.bc
I have no advice, after all we all get through it and I don’t know any college kids that still sleep with mommy. My personal method was to put them in their own bed (bassinet in our room for 3 months then crib) and not give in to any ‘just for attention’ cries. I probably just lucked out because both kids were sleeping 6+ hours straight by 4 weeks and 8-10 by 3 months. I have heard it’s harder for kids that are breastfed to sleep away from mom for long spurts. Must be that extra bond ya’ll share.
Awwww…hang in there. Things will smooth out and he’ll be sleeping better soon. I know it’s no consolation right now when you are so exhausted. I’m also feeling that way at the moment since we just converted our daughters bed to a toddler bed and she hasn’t been sleeping very well at all.
Oh lordy, it’s worse than my current deal. Sometimes we go for an entire three hours in a row. SOMETIMES.
I’m amazed that you seem so sane. Because I am becoming a B*tch Extraordinaire.
i totally hear you! my preshus baybee is 5 mos. and was a terrible sleeper until… i gagged her on a pacifier until she accepted it and we haven’t looked back! breastfed and sleeps 7pm-4am w/outhelp from the boob…
i’m just sayin’ more fun to be lazy when well rested!
I truly think that going back in the room every 15 min. or however often makes the crying WORSE. We did CIO at three months, and it always exacerbated the crying if one of us went in there and rubbed his belly or talked to him. CIO worked wonderfully for us.
my parents let me cry until I fell asleep. I am not sure if I shared the room with my sister however (just a bit older than me) it has to be frustrating not knowing what will officially work, but what one day something will click and he will sleep all night.
My very tiny extremely humble opinion is that little babies have little tiny tummies and they need to eat often when they’re little tiny. Tiny tiny tiny. The whole crying it out thing works (sometimes) but damn, not til they’re close to a year. Just generalizing, but at one year a whole lot of things change.
And everything has to be adjusted and readjusted for teething, colds, flu’s, fevers, boo-boos… etc. That changes the whole game plan, too.
He’s not a teenager who can load up on an entire pizza before bed and then sleep til noon. Not that LilZ does that hahaha.
I nursed my 2 as much as they wanted (pretty much — I pumped at work, and sometimes I said, ok, enough, break please!) til they were a year old. I think it takes that long for their tummies to stay full. One weaned at 18 months, the other at 2. By the time they finished, they were nursing once or twice a day, tops, and skipping days, too.
They just get scared when they’re little and want the comfort of knowing you’re there.
Just my two cents. I got so much grief for “spoiling them” and “giving in to them” and in hindsight I can say, Forget that. They just needed me, that was all.
that comment was insanely long, sorry.
It is De-Lurk Day! I really enjoy reading your blog. You have such a talent. Keep it up!
Oh . .. so sorry about the sleep! CIO worked for us when I became so desperate that my guilt was outweighed by my near-psychotic need for sleep/personal space! And Halle was 8 months, so I was in your shoes. I figure that you do what you need to do and when that doesn’t work for you anymore? You’ll make a change. Until you’re ready though, all the advice in the world doesn’t make you feel any more rested does it?
What I don’t understand is the lack of dark circles under HIS eyes? He’s too darn cute!
Sorry it’s so hard on you
Wish I had some sure-fire expert advice, but I know I’ll be in the exact same (sinking) boat some day.
My one year old didn’t sleep through the night (the way the professionals define it as 5 hours at a time) until she was 11 months old. I don’t have any advice that worked, but I feel ya mah sistah!
Unless AndyZ is not getting enough nourishment during the day (and I have no doubt you feed him enough, obvs), there is NO reason he shouldn’t be able to sleep through the night without eating at this point. He is most likely breastfeeding for comfort, not food. And while I understand the need to comfort your baby (I have two!), having mama get enough sleep is also important–I would have turned into a MONSTER if I was sleeping the way you are, which wouldn’t have been good for me OR my kids. If you want AndyZ to sleep, you may have do some version of CIO, which sucks, I know BUT the dividends can pay off for years.