Comments on: Am I Married In Your Eyes?

By: stacey

stacey — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 14:05:01 +0000

This is perfect. Wonderful!! I love it. I said recently on another friend’s blog on the same topic, that along the lines of the religious marrige, then divorce shouldn’t be allowed, via their “rules” How many people would that affect? I wish some people were just able to open their eyes, minds and hearts more. I feel sorry for them. (nope not a religious person, a spiritual one, yes.)

By: -R-

-R- — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 21:53:38 +0000

I am religious, and I got married in a religious ceremony, but I agree with you, and I like the way you wrote this.

By: zoot

zoot — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 20:11:14 +0000

@lisa-marie -

Scurvy and I actually had that exact conversation today – in response to her comment. In a perfect world I think that would make everyone happy. I think that’s one of those Never Gonna Happen So We Have To Settle things because of the semantics. The word “marriage” is used so often legally that redefining, or replacing it with “civil union” would be a legislative nightmare.

But – that doesn’t keep it from still being true. If we could turn back time I think we’d have to just give churches that word to use on their ceremonies and let each church decide – but make civil unions and marriages equal in the eyes of the law. Would be a great solution! You’re spot on!

By: lisa-marie

lisa-marie — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 20:06:26 +0000

Maybe it’s time to take marriage out of the secular world and make it strictly a religious ceremony, and make everyone have legal Civil Unions. That way everyone who is in a committed relationship can have the same rights regardelss of their sex or beliefs or whatever, and people who want their union blessed by God can have a marriage ceremony in their church. Would that make everyone happy?!?

By: zeghsy

zeghsy — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 20:02:01 +0000

my bf is a republican. *eye roll* i’m not. i informed him that there would be certain topics that would be “deal-breakers” for me. this is one of them. thank goodness he’s a NON-RELIGIOUS republican. i can still speak to him. thank you zoot!

By: Lindsey

Lindsey — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 18:06:35 +0000

Just got to stand up (comment up?) in support of your sentiments. It’s been too long since I’ve been active in this fight. I blame the raising of babies, but what kind of excuse is that?!

By: Sierra

Sierra — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 17:31:38 +0000

Here here, Zoot!!

I hope you know that you’ve already done something important for the cause by putting this out there – minds get changed when people come out as passionate allies and advocates.

By: Cobwebs

Cobwebs — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 16:57:33 +0000

Nicely said.

I recently saw a suggestion to refer to peoples’ husband/wife as their “boyfriend/girlfriend,” “long-term partner,” or similar phrase, and when corrected simply respond that you choose not to recognize anyone’s marriage. I sort of like that; it gives people with a “real” marriage a little taste of how people who aren’t allowed to marry must feel.

By: Swistle

Swistle — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 16:11:42 +0000

Oh, also! My husband and I got married by a justice of the peace, and we asked for the non-religious ceremony but the guy did the religious one by mistake and we just went along with it. So we actually LIED all through our marriage vows, promising to respect God and so forth when we don’t even BELIEVE in God! Our marriage should be invalid, I’m thinking. But—oh wait, I have girl parts! and he has guy parts! so THAT’S okay then!

By: Swistle

Swistle — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 16:09:40 +0000

WOOT.

I recently started donating money, too. I’d been spinning around and around thinking, “What can I do? What can I do? I don’t know what to do!!” And then I realized I could FUND the people who DO know what to do.

I take heart that this is only a matter of time. It didn’t used to be legal for a black woman and a white man to marry, but now it is, and people who think it shouldn’t be are considered crazy hateful racists. It will be the same with this.