Comments on: Knocking On Wood Violently

By: girlfiend

girlfiend — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 11:57:05 +0000

God I hope this is true for us. My big kid is about 6months younger than NikkiZ and if he doesn’t stop terrorizing us he may not live to 4. Last night he smacked my husband in the face and broke his glasses.

By: Heather

Heather — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 11:34:27 +0000

She sometimes scares me from a distance Here’s hoping for smooth sailing!

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 10:45:52 +0000

Hi Zoot, I love reading your blog but don’t think I’ve ever commented before.

I just really wanted to say to Jessica, as a step-child with step-siblings, to be nice to your step-children and try to see things from their point of view. Remember that however bad your and their father think their mother is, she is their mother. Fair or not, they are likely to see you as part of the reason that their parents are not together. Don’t say bad things about their mother in front of the children, and try to see that things are hard for them too. Hope this helps.

And hope that it is indeed a phase for your step-child/children, it is a phase that most step-children go through I think (I don’t remember mine, but I think my mother does, but I do remember my step-siblings’s). Otherwise you may have to investigate changing the custodial arrangements. So that they spend more time with their mother? More time with just their father without you? Custody arrangements don’t need to be the same for all the children and can change as circumstances change. And try to give the older children some say in the custody arrangements.

Good luck!

By: Jessica

Jessica — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 22:54:45 +0000

I have not birthed anything, but I have four step children – two girls, 14 and 12, and a set of twins (one of each), 4 yesterday. I have only been in their lives for two years, but so far: 14 is EVIL EVIL EVIL. She went from being fairly nice and happy for her father (who had a lousy marriage) to sending hate mail banning me from her Middle School graduation. 12 has been pretty good – but then again, the 12 yr old is a peach at heart, and the 14 yr old – not so much (even her grandparents say she’s just like her mother – not a good thing). I’ll be interested to see if 12 turns EVIL at 14.

The twins have been a mixed bag – 2 was tiresome but not horrible, and the first part of three was bad for the girl, while the second part of three has been bad for the boy. Which in this case makes sense because the boy has been consistently about 6 months behind his sister in everything except language. Hopefully the days of tantrums and “NO!” are on the wane….

By: Jen Ambrose

Jen Ambrose — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 19:13:27 +0000

Love that she is becoming more “handle-able”. I’m finding that is the case too, with my almost-four-year-old-diva-in-training. Summer has also been a bit easier because I’m able to be a bit more lax on wardrobe choices which leads to less fights. I’m worried about when school starts again though.

By: Stephanie

Stephanie — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 18:56:28 +0000

You have no idea how much I needed to hear that it will get better. Three is tough. Three and a half is killing me! I keep looking at my husband and saying “Is this her? Is this really her? Is she really going to be such a mean spirited, defiant person?” I know that’s not sho she is, but it feels like a dark cloud has steeled over her some days. Her twin brother is not so bad. Is it a girl thing? Ok, so age four is better. Promise?

By: Devilish Southern Belle

Devilish Southern Belle — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 18:29:22 +0000

Glad to hear things are getting better

I can’t even remember what it was like when my children were those ages, except that life was a whirlwind.

By: Amy Jo

Amy Jo — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 17:54:14 +0000

Thank you Miss Zoot! My son is almost three and a half, and almost daily I am tempted to ship him off to the circus. He is downright wretched some days, so knowing that there is even a glimmer of a possibility that he might outgrow this stage is comforting.

By: Melizzard

Melizzard — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 17:45:48 +0000

We’ve entered the 4 year old era this month and it’s all sunshine and kisses.. for now. Cause I know what lies ahead … we’re two short years away from DRAMA!!!

By: Bonnie

Bonnie — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 17:15:34 +0000

what is it about 2nd children who are girls? I seem to have spawned an evil genius as well who is insanely good at manipulating everyone around her. And she loves to test situations. She tries something and when she hears no, she just smiles. and does it again. and then laughs and does it again.

So what? You’re saying she might grow out of it? Thank goodness, because I’m a little afraid I might be raising a dictator hell-bent on taking over the world. and maybe I need to stay in her good graces.