Comments on: Spending The Day Taking Deep Breaths and Counting To 10 http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/ misszoot.com - the mundane life of a horribly geeky mother of 3 Sun, 12 Feb 2012 13:32:42 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Robert W http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-779628 Robert W Mon, 10 May 2010 05:58:04 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-779628 I'm a new father and both my wife and I seem to be Mr. and Mrs. Grumpy pants of late. We have very short fuses and tend to argue frequently. I've been reading some books in an attempt to figure out what is going on. One of the books I'm reading "7 habits of highly effective people" talks about visualizing yourself in those situations where you are acting out and imagine how you would like to respond instead. Spending a little time every morning really helps me out. The other book that was interesting is a book called "The NO complaining rule". I'm sure that no one wants to spend time being grumpy. I sure don't. I hope that I have been able to help a few of you. I’m a new father and both my wife and I seem to be Mr. and Mrs. Grumpy pants of late. We have very short fuses and tend to argue frequently. I’ve been reading some books in an attempt to figure out what is going on. One of the books I’m reading “7 habits of highly effective people” talks about visualizing yourself in those situations where you are acting out and imagine how you would like to respond instead. Spending a little time every morning really helps me out. The other book that was interesting is a book called “The NO complaining rule”. I’m sure that no one wants to spend time being grumpy. I sure don’t. I hope that I have been able to help a few of you.

]]> By: Nancy R http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769671 Nancy R Fri, 11 Dec 2009 03:37:44 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769671 Your mind is occupied with your new interest in cooking...I'm always snippier when I'm trying to focus but my attention keeps getting pulled away. Could that be part of it? Your mind is occupied with your new interest in cooking…I’m always snippier when I’m trying to focus but my attention keeps getting pulled away. Could that be part of it?

]]> By: Andrea http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769171 Andrea Fri, 04 Dec 2009 20:04:11 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769171 THANK GOD it's not just me! I'm battling with this exact same issue lately and it feels like its been going on for months off and on. I start each day telling myself that I can handle it and I will do everything I can to remember to keep my patience... and then they will start fighting about something and it just starts a downward spiral of me getting tense and short tempered and then the yelling and no one is happy with anyone. Lather, rinse, repeat until its time for bed. I go to bed feeling like I'm a failure and a horrible mom. I've been trying to come up with different techniques to help me calm down and step back from the situation and I definitely see better results when I can actually do it. I'm determined to turn it around and learn more patience- it just takes time I guess. It's good to hear that someone else gets into these ruts too. At least we're really trying to be better. We'll get there ;) THANK GOD it’s not just me! I’m battling with this exact same issue lately and it feels like its been going on for months off and on. I start each day telling myself that I can handle it and I will do everything I can to remember to keep my patience… and then they will start fighting about something and it just starts a downward spiral of me getting tense and short tempered and then the yelling and no one is happy with anyone. Lather, rinse, repeat until its time for bed. I go to bed feeling like I’m a failure and a horrible mom. I’ve been trying to come up with different techniques to help me calm down and step back from the situation and I definitely see better results when I can actually do it. I’m determined to turn it around and learn more patience- it just takes time I guess. It’s good to hear that someone else gets into these ruts too. At least we’re really trying to be better. We’ll get there ;)

]]> By: Denora http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769046 Denora Thu, 03 Dec 2009 08:05:42 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769046 Oh it's SO not just you. I don't even have kids and I find that I'm in the same sort of moody rut. I am constantly snapping at my boyfriend for absolutely no reason. I thought originally that it was my unemployment getting to me (much like the first commenter) but as I hear more and more people talking about being in the same kind of mood so often, I wonder if it isn't more that time of year. Either way, I have an appointment with my doctor to see if there's anything else wrong with me that might be causing it. It can't hurt, right? Oh it’s SO not just you. I don’t even have kids and I find that I’m in the same sort of moody rut. I am constantly snapping at my boyfriend for absolutely no reason. I thought originally that it was my unemployment getting to me (much like the first commenter) but as I hear more and more people talking about being in the same kind of mood so often, I wonder if it isn’t more that time of year. Either way, I have an appointment with my doctor to see if there’s anything else wrong with me that might be causing it. It can’t hurt, right?

]]> By: Lise http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769038 Lise Thu, 03 Dec 2009 05:21:56 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769038 When my four kiddoes were small I found that little breaks throughout the day kept me from building up to major crankiness. I would do things like go into the bathroom for five minutes and locked the door behind me. Even a short break can help a great deal, even if the toddler is calling "Mama? Mama?" and sticking her little fingers under the door to try to reach you. I took full advantage of naptime as a chance to recharge my own batteries and required my older kids to read or do something quiet during that time. I admire your effort to be"on" all the time for your kids. It sounds like you're an incredibly devoted mom. But you're trying to do so very much: Free-lance, cook, keep the house from falling down around your ears, and interact with the kids all day. And to top that off, you are grieving pretty heavily right now. Be kind to yourself in any way you can. You deserve it. When my four kiddoes were small I found that little breaks throughout the day kept me from building up to major crankiness. I would do things like go into the bathroom for five minutes and locked the door behind me. Even a short break can help a great deal, even if the toddler is calling “Mama? Mama?” and sticking her little fingers under the door to try to reach you. I took full advantage of naptime as a chance to recharge my own batteries and required my older kids to read or do something quiet during that time.

I admire your effort to be”on” all the time for your kids. It sounds like you’re an incredibly devoted mom. But you’re trying to do so very much: Free-lance, cook, keep the house from falling down around your ears, and interact with the kids all day. And to top that off, you are grieving pretty heavily right now. Be kind to yourself in any way you can. You deserve it.

]]> By: ShortyMom http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769026 ShortyMom Thu, 03 Dec 2009 03:22:31 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769026 I definitely have those times when I get up thinking today will be better. Today I will work on my patience. Today I will be a better mom. Then by the time the kids are in bed, I've snapped at least a dozen times and I hate myself and what I've become. Double that around pms time. You're not alone! I definitely have those times when I get up thinking today will be better. Today I will work on my patience. Today I will be a better mom. Then by the time the kids are in bed, I’ve snapped at least a dozen times and I hate myself and what I’ve become. Double that around pms time. You’re not alone!

]]> By: Sara http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769014 Sara Thu, 03 Dec 2009 01:03:26 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769014 Nutritional concerns, losing your job, potential seasonal awareness disorder...any of those are enough to make someone irritable, but then you add the loss of your daddy to that mix, and it is no wonder you have a shorter fuse. You have talked about the problems you have getting a good night's sleep because of the little ones, and I wonder if that is playing a role too. Me, I'm not snapping at anyone...but that's probably only because I don't have anyone underfoot. I am ignoring phone calls however. Don't feel like dealing with other people's problems. This whole being at home and not working has already lost its allure. Nutritional concerns, losing your job, potential seasonal awareness disorder…any of those are enough to make someone irritable, but then you add the loss of your daddy to that mix, and it is no wonder you have a shorter fuse. You have talked about the problems you have getting a good night’s sleep because of the little ones, and I wonder if that is playing a role too.

Me, I’m not snapping at anyone…but that’s probably only because I don’t have anyone underfoot. I am ignoring phone calls however. Don’t feel like dealing with other people’s problems. This whole being at home and not working has already lost its allure.

]]> By: Sara http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769013 Sara Thu, 03 Dec 2009 00:47:36 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769013 With two jobs and going to school full time, I find myself being a grouch to my son WAY more often than I'd like to admit. And sometimes it seems as though I can't stop. When it gets to that point, I try to do something different than what I've been doing- as in getting out of the house. Even if it's just taking the kiddo to the free mall playground. OR I just take a day off and get myself a massage....they both seem to work for me. With two jobs and going to school full time, I find myself being a grouch to my son WAY more often than I’d like to admit. And sometimes it seems as though I can’t stop. When it gets to that point, I try to do something different than what I’ve been doing- as in getting out of the house. Even if it’s just taking the kiddo to the free mall playground.
OR I just take a day off and get myself a massage….they both seem to work for me.

]]> By: Cara http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769011 Cara Wed, 02 Dec 2009 23:56:55 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769011 I'm not a parent, but my job as a supervisor often feels very similar. And I definitely relate to the feeling. For me, the solution is usually to take a night or weekend where I don't touch work, don't deal with housework/family issues/etc., and just generally do something that helps me recharge. So, drawing that parallel, how about finding a babysitter and taking a few hours doing something for yourself? Or letting yourself have that bath, book and beer even if you weren't patient today? It might very well be what allows you to be patient tomorrow. I’m not a parent, but my job as a supervisor often feels very similar. And I definitely relate to the feeling. For me, the solution is usually to take a night or weekend where I don’t touch work, don’t deal with housework/family issues/etc., and just generally do something that helps me recharge. So, drawing that parallel, how about finding a babysitter and taking a few hours doing something for yourself? Or letting yourself have that bath, book and beer even if you weren’t patient today? It might very well be what allows you to be patient tomorrow.

]]> By: Michelle Smiles http://www.misszoot.com/2009/12/02/spending-the-day-taking-deep-breaths-and-counting-to-10/#comment-769004 Michelle Smiles Wed, 02 Dec 2009 19:38:32 +0000 http://www.misszoot.com/?p=5635#comment-769004 Oh the guilt. There are weeks/months that I'll go to bed every night feeling like I failed at being a mom that day. This week hasn't been a particularly stellar mom week for me... Oh the guilt. There are weeks/months that I’ll go to bed every night feeling like I failed at being a mom that day. This week hasn’t been a particularly stellar mom week for me…

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