Excuses, Excuses.
You know how we all kinda grumble about people in public that we don’t know? Whether we see someone who parents in a way we don’t approve, or drive in a way that annoys us – we don’t freak out or anything – but we probably mumble a little something about them under our breath or in our heads?
That person driving you crazy? Is probably me.
It occurs to me often, when I examine something I’m doing from outside my own scope, that I probably annoy a lot of people. But I have my defenses! Don’t be annoyed by me! I thought I’d take a moment to explain to you why I’m annoying:
- I like to strike up conversations with the checkout lady at the grocery store. Of course this slows her down a bit, and while I don’t care? The person behind me probably does. But these are my friends! They are my only adult contact throughout my day. I’m desperate for conversation about something other than, “THE MOON!!!!” It may slow things down but it livens up my day entirely just to talk to a grown-up for the 2.5 minutes she’s ringing up my groceries.
- I forget I’m driving slowly. See, I’m not a fast driver naturally. So, if there’s no one next to me on the road to judge my speed against (and I don’t use cruise control in town) then I can sometimes start to slow down without realizing it. Often, I’ll see someone in one of my mirrors speeding behind me and I look down and think, “Crap! I’m going 10 miles under the speed limit!” and I’ll do the thing that makes MrZ curse louder on the road than anything else: I’ll speed up. When other people do this to him? He wants to punch them, which is why I’m defending myself. I’m not suddenly speeding up to stop you from passing me, I promise. I just didn’t realize I was going slow until I saw you were going to pass me!
- I give my kids food to eat that they’ve already dropped on the ground. Listen, unless we’re in a bathroom or at a dog park, I’m not even going to assume that the germs on the ground are any worse than the germs in my own home. So, if they drop a cracker at Target or a chip at the ballpark? I’m going to pick it up off the ground, scan it for any obvious signs of contamination, and give it right back to them. I’m sorry if this makes you gasp in horror (It actually did make a grandmother gasp one time) – I’m not a bad Mom, I promise! It’s just hard for me to imagine that the food they eat off my carpet with 2 dogs and 2 cats, is any better. (This is probably doing less to defend me and more to make it sound like I live in a gross home.)
- I bring a talkative child to the movie theater. Now, she whispers, but she does ask a lot of questions. And while I do my best to sit far away from anyone else and teach her to not talk, she still sometimes does. And while I’m certain this probably annoys people, she does whisper as quietly as possible AND – I have decided I just don’t care. I have been tuning out kids in movie theaters for years because I go to more movies in theaters than ANYONE. It’s my THING. It’s my treat that I love and I do it quite often. And I figure if it has never ever phased me (the annoying teenagers are much harder for me to ignore – QUIT TEXTING ALREADY) even when I didn’t have one of those talkative kids to help me relate, I’m not going to worry about the people who may be bothered by us. We don’t go to the movies often together, we tend to do more watching at home. So, in terms of people I annoy with my actions? I’ve probably pissed off way more people with my liberal leaning bumper stickers.
Do my excuses help or are you still going to be extremely bothered by me when I do these things in public? (Don’t worry! They bother my husband too, so we can totally still be friends.) Or, what is it that YOU sometimes do that people probably grumble about and what’s YOUR excuse?
I can actually relate to all of those (except for the fact that I probably go a little too fast most of the time). As far as giving the kids food that has just been dropped on the ground? Come to my house, watch the food fall, and the kids reaction: “five second rule!!” That happens outside as well. My excuse is that it builds up their immune system. By the way, I like to talk to the checkers as well. I have my favorites, and if they are working, I have been known to go to their line even if it is longer. I honestly believe they like it to.
I always talk to people at the grocery store! It annoys my kids more than anything (“but you don’t even know that person!”). I figure nobody really likes being there, so why not have a nice conversation to help pass the time?
I do all of those things. Most especially letting the kids eat food that they have dropped. Restaurants, parks, outside, anywhere if they drop it and it doesn’t have anything obvious on it, they can have it. It drives my MIL batty. She is scared they are going to get some horrible disease from it. So far, they are the healthiest of the grandkids. go figure.
I don’t start conversations with the checkout people at the store, but they always tell me their life story. My kids just roll their eyes because everyone talks to me about everything! I know details about the ACE Hardware lady’s divorce, the grocery store checker’s drug addicted son and on and on. I must just have that kind, listening face:)
The kids talking in the theater thing? That kind of annoys me. Not so much during actual movies made for kids, but when people bring their kids to more adult movies with quieter dialogue and I can’t hear because the kid is asking 9 million questions or is bored or whatever, that makes me crazy. But I mostly get really annoyed when parents let their kids kick my seat, or pull on it or stand up holding on to my seat so they are breathing in my ear. That drives me batty!
I know I piss people off at the grocery store with my ten gazillion coupons and my cart full of groceries. But, I reason that if they don’t want to stand behind me, they can use the self-check!
I do all of those except the movie thing. Sabrina has only been to 1 movie (The Princess and The Frog) – I knew there would likely be a lot of other small kids so she probably wouldn’t bother anyone. But I will admit that anyone who talks in the movie theater annoys the crap out of me…I’m an old fart that way.
You are probably making the checker’s day brighter by striking up the conversation, too.
I can’t think of anything off-hand that I do that is annoying, which means there are probably things that I’m doing that I’m not even aware of, which is probably worse!
first of all, everyone should know that your house is very clean! (my mother would say that’s impossible because dogs and cats live in your home! haha!) and secondly, ny is very quiet in the theater, and would never bother me!
my husband is a trucker and he hates when people suddenly speed up. Though for him it is because people hate being behind a truck.
Anywho, I also let my kids eat something they dropped unless it is wet or sticky because then all sorts of hair gets attached. But popcorn in Target? Oh yeah, I give it back.
I don’t think any of those things would annoy me but I do have issues with eating things that have been on the ground ANYWHERE! Because people spit on the ground, animals urinate, you carry feces and urine and germs on the bottoms of your shoes and spread it everywhere you walk so all that nasty stuff is anywhere you may drop a cracker or M&M. But that’s one of my personal hang ups. I wouldn’t judge anyone who did differently.
I’m sure there are tons of things I do that annoy people!
Only the first two things bug me, and its easiest enough to not bug me with those. First, shop during ‘off hours.’ If this is your entertainment and your adult conversation because you’re stuck at home all day, surely you don’t need to shop at 5:30 on a work night, right? At any other time, I really don’t care how long you take at the check out. Second, wait until I’ve passed you to speed up. You were going that slowly for miles, another few moments won’t hurt.
Oh yes, the five second rule was a staple in my house growing up as well. Builds immunity, right?
My thing is talking on my cell phone in stores and at restaurants. I keep my voice pretty quiet but if I’m perusing the cereal aisle or at a restaurant by myself and I get a call, I’ll usually take it. I’m sure it annoys people but I figure if I was with someone at the store/restaurant they’d hear me speaking anyways…
The thing that sets me off is 0.2 seconds? When people don’t put their carts back. There are cart receptacles all over the parking lot! Oh, the diatribes in my head.
Depends on the food – popcicle? ice cream? hell no – it’s trash. Any dry goods item – cracker, cookie, etc. Sure, as others have said, it builds the immune system. I also have much less problem allowing this at home vs. out. At least at home, I know where the germs have come from.
I am sure I do stuff to annoy people but I don’t know what it is. I probably need to be more aware, but I don’t really care if you’re annoyed – as long as I am not HURTING you then it sounds like a YP, not an MP.
Haha I talk to strangers all the time. The grocery store thing – I do it too, because like you I don’t get a lot of conversation in a day, period. Especially right now – living alone and doing correspondence classes for the summer to finish up my degree – so I can easily go days without talking to anyone – or even leaving the house, if I am not making a conscious effort to do so!
I am the person behind you in line who is also in need of adult conversation and will jump into the conversation you are having with the checker. Then the person behind me is the one getting pissed off. But I don’t care.
My friend’s kid is the kid who doesn’t talk during the movie but gets up during any song (or hint of song) and dances. She has this jump up and down in circle while bopping her head dance. I find it so amusing and is the best part of the whole experience. Who cares what people think! It’s not like we are taking her to the Lovely Bones, they’re kids’ movies!
I let my kids eat things that fall on the floor, too (well, dry things – crackers or M&Ms). But I’m too self-concious to let people know that; I always say “oh, that’s trash now”, put it in my pocket, and then give it back when I round the corner. So pathetic, but there it is. They’re healthy, it builds their immune systems.
I also probably annoy people at the movies. If it is really packed, I’ll ask people to move over so we can sit together. And if it is mostly empty, I’ll put my feet up on the seat in front of me.
hehe, I totally let my kids eat stuff they dropped on the ground. at first, I didn’t, but then I realized they were finding things on the ground anyways and would put them in their mouth.
none of your things annoy me. I’ve done most of those things just today, lol. you should here me with our therapists and many many doctors. my BFF is my sons vision teacher. just kidding…sorta
More power to you! Who cares if the things you do bother other people? I’ve recognized that when I get irritated at people for doing stuff like you’ve listed above, it’s because I’m ill at something else and I’m looking for something more “acceptable” to be ill at than what’s going on in my own life.
Except, I do caution you about giving your kids food that’s fallen on the ground out in public. There are some scary, scary germs out there now that are so resistant to any medication we’ve come up with. I work in an ICU, and I’ve had patients on 2 weeks worth of “the big guns” because something little got complicated by MRSA, VRE, or VRSA. Then people like me leave work, where we’ve mucked around in it all day, and go to target to get groceries and toilet paper before going home. And we wear the same shoes.
I wouldn’t feed my kids stuff off of the ground unless it’s at home. Trust me, your dogs are much cleaner. And I doubt they’ve tracked through antifreeze in the parking lot before traipsing into your house, either.
On the food on the ground-sorry, it’s the trash or at home, the dog’s. She thinks it’s hers when it hits the floor.
Thought of this post today while at the grocery store. Got behind a lady that used the wipe deals they furnish you and wiped down the WHOLE front of the buggy-seat, handle and everything and didn’t want to touch any of the buggy with her bare hand. No telling what she would have done if she seen you hand the food back to the kids!
I LOVE talking to strangers and I let my kids eat things they dropped on the floor most of the time. I actually drive way to fast but as long as you were in the right lane (NOT the left!) I wouldn’t let your driving bother me. I might be surprised you weren’t a little-gray-haired-old-lady when I looked over at you but I’d still smile!
Hmm,yes I’m afraid you ARE annoying. But aren’t we all?
I look at each checkout lane and guage the speed of the checker based on a) their age (older ones talk more) and b) the amount they’re talking to the person checking out. I also look at the current customer and see if they have their method of payment handy or are they going to wait until they hear the total before digging around in their ridiculous giant suitcase / purse for their checkbook?
I drive slowly too, and don’t care who is annoyed.
I’m with you on the next one too. Kids aren’t going to get sick from dirt.
The movie thing tho…we would have a problem there. My husband and I can’t go to the movies very often, maybe 3 times a year, because of the cost. It is a HUGE treat if we get to go to the theater and if someone is talking, we’re gonna have an issue. I will start with the universal glare of disapproval, and then I will ask you to please keep it down. After that I won’t be being nice. The rules don’t apply at a movie such as say, “Toy Story” though. There, *I* am the intruder.
I will do the same thing if my husband and I are trying to have a ‘once in a blue moon’ nice dinner out, we specifically ask not to be seated by children. What are kids doing in a $30 a plate place anyway?!?!?
So there you are. We’re alike, and different, and annoying.