Love To Laugh
This weekend we went to Panera for breakfast. We go there all the time so when Nikki had to go to the bathroom I sent her alone. No big deal. Then she comes back and whispers in my ear: “That bathroom had a urinal!”
I immediately started cracking up and trying to explain to her she went in the wrong bathroom. She, of course, is too proud to admit she might be wrong and INSISTED that she was in the RIGHT bathroom. I was laughing so hard I was crying at the fact that she was so convinced she was right; she thought it made sense that Panera just up and put a urinal in the girl’s bathroom. When we walked over there together (while I was still red with laughter) she looked at the doors and sighed. “UHGGG. You’re right.” Then she started cracking up with me. Right there in the middle of Panera. TEARS of laughter. It was AWESOME.
**********
Last night I heard the kids playing hide-n-go seek in the dining room. This is a BIG No-No as there are plates on the walls that might fall if they run into them. They KNOW this is a rule. I’ve said it ninety million times. I was frustrated with obscene amounts of baking and just yelled, “ARE YOU ALL PLAYING IN THE DINING ROOM?” I was mad and I don’t yell much anymore so they knew it. And immediately both started crying. I sent them to the corner while I finished up what I was doing in the kitchen. I went to where they were and sat on the floor. I told them to come to me but I said, “There better not be ANY smiling.”
NOW…this is a STUPID thing to say. Everyone knows the second you’re told NOT to smile, it’s the only thing you want to do. I just wasn’t thinking, I was just wanting them to be upset and thought telling them not to smile would work. They walked up and both had their hands over their faces. You could tell they were trying NOT to smile but they couldn’t stop. And they kept looking at each other and making it worse. Finally? I gave in too. And we all just sat on the floor laughing hysterically. Them through tears, me through my anger.
***********
Sometimes I say the best thing your child can see you do is apologize. But I also believe your child needs to see you laugh. I have amazing memories of my Dad laughing. He had a great full-body laugh-to-tears laugh. Especially when he was hanging out with his siblings. I loved those gatherings because I loved watching him laugh. I especially enjoy the memories of ME making him laugh, although I don’t think I did as intensely as his sisters could. They could really crack him up. But I think our kids should see us crack up sometimes. Adulthood is scary, and serious business, but they need to know we also can get bad cases of the giggles at inappropriate times. Because then they can know that – while there are unfun things about being an adult – we can also still laugh our asses off and really stupid things.
Especially when someone specifically tells us not to.
I grew up with twin younger brothers and a dad–who I adored (I was totally Daddy’s Little Girl)–who was a real stickler for table manners. Somehow, once I was a teenager, our dinners devolved to the point where there was always something the twins would do that would leave me HELPLESS with laughter. It was like getting the giggles at a funeral, because I knew we were going to get into trouble. It could be something totally insignificant and stupid, but still, I’d end up red-faced, trying not to laugh and not able to eat because I was *sure* I’d choke on my food. Inevitably my dad would end up bellowing that the three of us needed to take our plates outside and “eat with the rest of the animals.” He never followed through though.
Once the three of us went off to college, family dinners were rare–Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and the odd weekend here and there. But still, my brothers were preconditioned to do something to set me off and I was preconditioned to silently fall apart at the dinner table. Even *after* college, when we were ADULTS with CAREERS and I was bringing my boyfriend (now dh) to family dinners. My dad never stopped bellowing, but you could tell, he enjoyed the tradition of it all.
This is how a lot of my family reunions were growing up!
Laughing really is one of the most beautiful things in the world!
My parents always laughed.
Sometimes about the most inappropriate things imaginable, but still. They’ve been married for 36 years, and most of the best memories I have are of my family laughing together. My husband and I are the same way. He can make me laugh like no one else.
Life is just better when you can laugh.
My almost 4 year old daughter saw this picture of your daughter and said “Ooo I like that girl’s dress. I like that girl.” My daughter loves clothes and shoes.