I’ll Be Happy If I Never Have To Think About Calling 911 Again
I walked up on a lady unconscious and collapsed halfway into a freezer at the grocery store on Monday. I noticed her the same time an employee did and I got her talking a bit and helped her out of the freezer and into my lap while the employee called the paramedics. Another customer who happened to be an ER nursed came up and assessed the lady’s vitals. We could get her talking a bit, but then she would pass out again. She wasn’t mobile at all. I rubbed her hair and her face while the nurse kept her talking. She was only 56, it’s not like she was old. HEMSI got there, they thanked me for my help, and I left…forgetting the tater tots I had entered the aisle to purchase in the first place. It’s weird, now, not knowing how everything turned out.
THEN…crazy, mumbling, homeless guy showed up at my house and angrily mumbling that I should drive him to the store and flailing his arms at my van when I decline his invitation. My heart was in my throat for several hours after that.
And THEN…to cap off the weirdest several days in history? I almost choked to death at Cracker Barrel last night on a piece of cornbread. FOR REAL. For a few moments I couldn’t breath and E was on the verge of jumping up and trying to save me when my airway finally cleared. And then…once my heart calmed down…I couldn’t stop laughing at the fact that I ALMOST CHOKED TO DEATH ON CORNBREAD. Who in the hell does that?
Needless to say, it’s been a VERY weird week. If I wasn’t anxiously waiting for Harry Potter I’d stay in bed until Sunday for fear the week wasn’t done with me yet.
How about you? Any near-death, 911-related incidents in your week? No? Then maybe I got YOURS.