This Is A Two-Part Entry: One Part Therapy, One Part Running Babbling.
In my issues dealing with stress eating, I’ve explained how I tend to make 3 steps forward and 2 steps back. Two good weeks having a rational relationship with food, and then 3 days of emotional binges. And I don’t mean Oh No! I ate three cookies after dinner!. I mean – I feel like I’m going to puke because I inhaled 3000 calories between the hours of 7pm and 9pm. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING.
The last three days have been just that. My anxiety levels area about double what they were on Saturday. Every night, I have had multiple things going on after work and even more adding to my To Do list for when I get home. We have several BIG things coming up in the next two weeks. Two big theater events relating to competitions, a big party, a half-marathon, and GLEE FINALLY COMES BACK NEXT WEEK – MUST FIT THAT IN MY SCHEDULE! My anxiety levels are at code red…BE ON ALERT.
Anyway – I always find that when I come here and say, “I’ve been a bad girl,” it tends to break that streak. I’m hoping writing this downward spiral down will make it STOP HAPPENING. And that I can regain control of my senses before I undo all of the hard work from the last few months. Thank you for humoring me.
Now…ON TO THE REAL ENTRY.
CHANGES IN MY LIFE SINCE I BECAME ACTIVE (Or INSANE, depending on your definition of the word.)
- I love shopping. FOR GEAR. I’ve never been a HUGE shopper, I don’t mind it, but it often feels like a stressful experience. But lately, when I have an excuse to buy something fitness-related I GET GIDDY. I finally bought a long-sleeve technical shirt the other day and I WAS SO EXCITED! And I spent another 30 minutes just walking around the store fantasizing about more money so I could buy more stuff. MORE GEAR!
- My clothes smell AWFUL. I’ve gotten to that point where most of my running/workout clothes needs to be washed on hot – TWICE – before they don’t smell like death. This may not be necessary anymore as it’s gotten colder and I’m not sweating as much, but the last few weeks of warm weather? OH MY GOD. It was AWFUL. And I’m not typically a stinky person, but this new lifestyle MAKES ME UBER STINKY.
- I have weird stuff in my car. At any given moments there’s a rubbermaid container full of hand weights, at least one yoga mat, a water bottle or two, some Gu packs (Gu CHOMPS Watermelon flavor are my NEW favorite fuel!), a couple of blinky lights for nightly running, and at least 3 pairs of extra gloves.
- My baseline “I feel good” level has changed. I’m always sore somewhere, so now I only complain of the pain level is above a 5 on a scale of 1-10. Or higher. I actually kinda like the general achiness because it is a reminder of the hard work I’m doing. Who knew I’d one day think, I’m happy I can’t stand up without wincing!
- I talk about exercise crap ALL THE TIME. This blog is totally proof of that, but it’s even worse in the real world. I’m constantly talking about my 800 repeat times, or the 100+ push-up we did at boot camp. It’s like when your best friend had a new boyfriend and all she ever did was talk about him? I HAVE A NEW BOYFRIEND. And when we’re not together running or doing boot camp, I’m talking about him NON-STOP. I guess this is that newlywed/lust stage in the relationship, I’m sure I’ll eventually get tired of him and start complaining about how he left the new toilet paper roll on the floor again. WHY CAN’T HE PUT IT ON THE HOLDER? IT ONLY TAKES ANOTHER TWO SECONDS? But not right now, right now I still think everything he does is adorable so I have to tell everyone I know about him. Luckily Donnie is a fitness buff too, so he doesn’t mind the chatter about tempo runs and shoulder presses. If he wasn’t also in a relationship with the same awesome boyfriend? (This analogy just stopped working.) He might not be as tolerant.