This is the entry I’ve been working on for DAYS. It’s so hard to find that line between sounding like I’m name-dropping or bragging, and simply trying to convey to you the experience of meeting women I’ve admired and loved (and possibly lusted after) for so long. I can’t mention every BlogHer I met (even though I would love to) because this entry would go on forever. So, I will speak of the women who have touched me in one way or another. (No. Not in that way…it wasn’t that kind of gathering…) Follow every link. Most of these women were on my links page before BlogHer, but some of them are now on the list as a result of BlogHer. These women are my inspiration. My idols. My friends. My sisters. My bitches and ‘hos. Wait, ignore that last one - it only applies to the first three on the list.
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(This entry is a follow-up to this one. If you want to answer the questions on your blog, go ahead and send me the link and I’ll add it to the list.)

First? My answers
1. Do your kids know about your blog? If they’re too young to know, do you plan to keep it open to them as they get older?
LilZ knows about my blog and reads it when I point him to a particular entry, or when he’s bored. I just assume he’ll read every entry. If I wouldn’t want him to read it? I put it on VOX and mark it as Friends Only. (Doesn’t that make you want to join VOX? I have plenty of invites left!)

2a. If so - do you worry they may get embarrassed later? What would you do if they asked you to stop writing about them? What would you do if they wanted you to take it down all together?
I do worry about the Embarrassment Factor. I am going to say what so many others said in that I just hope I have raised him to understand and value the ability to be able to life at yourself. I don’t post anything I think would hurt him, but I’m sure one day he may find some stories more embarassing than funny. Mainly I worry he’ll think I shouldn’t write about things like boob sweat, but as it is now? We are a pretty open family and I bitch about boob sweat out loud, and I’m sure he’d actually rather me save that one for the blog.

3. Do you think our kids will appreciate the archive of their childhood? Do you wish your parents had done the same?
God, I really hope so. I really hope he values this as an archive. It is a huge motivator in doing it. I’m too lazy and impatient to be a good scrapbooker, but this? This I can do. I hope he and maybe even his kids enjoy it.

4. Do you go back and re-read your past parenting milestones? Do you realize you forgot a lot?
Yes. I re-read a lot and Yes. I’ve forgotten LOADS MORE than I’ve remembered.

5. What about your children’s friends/teachers/moms-of-friends? What if they found your blog? Do you tell your child not to tell anyone about it or are they free to talk about it? Do you worry their teachers or other parents will think it’s weird?
I have never told LilZ not to tell people about the site because in reality? I’m not too scandalous on it. HOWEVER, I am so open about how I am so not a church-goer, and so many around here are, I worry that someone who doesn’t understand my humor would be offended. All of that said? I think he understands who would be okay to tell and who might not appreciate the jokes about going to Hell.

Other Bloggers Contributing to our Mommy Blogging Panel (via their own blogs)

Wacky Mommy

Michele

Margalit

Shash

MamaSutra

Jennifer (The Other Georgia)

kristyk

Bethiclaus

Keltybug

Mrs. CPA

Leah

Moogie’s World

countrymom
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So. The Alpha Mom interview. Sigh. Here’s the story:

Leah Peah was asked by Alpha Mom to do interviews of various bloggers. How in the hell I got on the list, I’ll never know, but I was so excited when I got the email from her regarding it, I might have peed a little bit. I’m sure I called everyone I knew to say, “GUESS WHAT?! I’m being interviewed!”

I’m kinda regretting that move now, because they’ll be expecting the link when the thing goes live. And I am thinking I’ll reveal that about the time I reveal the circumference of my thighs. Which is NEVER.

I was actually really nervous about meeting Leah. She is one of those writers who I’ve always thought had the power to change people’s lives with her stories. She writes so truthfully, her entries are so raw and honest and she has moved me with her words in ways few have. I just knew there would be an aura of wisdom around her that I could have only hoped to be permeated by. I was right.

Leah had emailed me the set of questions she would ask days before the actual interview. I memorized my answers and rehearsed giving them so often I could do it while sounding casual and relaxed. Little did I know how much would change when I got in front of a damn camera.

When I got to the appointment, Chris made me beautiful while Mario mic’d me up. It was very surreal because I felt kinda like a rock star. They sat me down and did a few sound checks while Leah got ready. Leah then made sure I had answers to all the questions, and I responded that I did. Because, well, I did. At that moment.

Unfortunately, somewhere between Leah explaining to me how I’d have to wait a beat after she asked the question before I answered and when Mario started filming, I forgot all of my answers. (I also forgot to wait a beat after the questions…because I’m an idiot.) I was unable to speak without saying the word, “Umm…” or “Like…” I also don’t think I used any words with more than two syllables and possibly the two-syllable ones were used incorrectly. Let’s just say I suffered a complete lack of any remotely intelligent conversational skills. All while Leah stayed poised and calm and intelligent and just all-around superb.

As Leah asked me the questions, I racked my brains for my well thought out answers. With most of them? I was quickly able to salvage the precontemplated answers into a mildly intelligent answer. MILDLY. Except, of course, for the question: What is your hot parenting tip?

I’m not even going to tell you what I said, because it was the ONLY thing I could think of since I had used it in a question earlier. And when the interview was almost over? I still couldn’t remember my pre-thought-out answer. And that night? I still couldn’t remember. As a matter of fact - I didn’t remember the answer until the next morning at the airport. My hot parenting tip: Keep a collection of old clothes and jewelery around for play time/dress-up. I mean, it’s not that hot of a tip, but it’s ten times better than the one I gave. I’m a MORON.

After the interview was over, Mario had to film me nodding. Yes, you heard me correctly - NODDING. It was hysterical. The footage would be spliced in with the rest of the interview later - and they did the same for Leah. Except - Leah had to do specific nods as Mario called them out, “Interested nod. Entertained nod. Concerned nod. etc” Leah then sent me off with some Alpha Mom swag as well as a rockin’ bracelet I have shown off to everyone, “Look! Leah made this! I’m so cool!” And yes, I’m well aware that declaring my own coolness is actually quite self-defeating, but I can’t quite help it.

All in all? It was an okay experience. Meeting Leah and the privilege of being interviewed made my fumbling during the interview seem less severe. I’m just praying Mario can perform some voodoo magic and make the final product make me look at least a little intelligent. If that’s at all possible.

Dude. Have you heard about the hotel we stayed in for BlogHer? Bah. Now - let me go on record saying two things: 1) I love Hyatt. I have never met a Hyatt I didn’t like. The one in Knoxville used to have a giant Christmas tree of Poinsettias and an elevator that went outside. 2) The Hyatt at San Jose was perfect for the BlogHer convention. It had the facilities we needed and the catering and the rooms all in one place.

All of that said? Strictly speaking of it as a hotel I happened to stay in this weekend? IT SUCKED. Our room smelled like stale laundry and the mattresses in our room had craters in the middle of them so that we wound up on top of each other by morning. The faucet to the bathroom broke and there was no bathtub. Only a shower. And showering with a baby is difficult because babies are SLIPPERY when they’re soapy and I just knew I was going to drop NikkiZ on her wet head. There were mystery stains on the floor and the pillows had hairs that were NOT mine on them. The elevators were dirty and the stairwell was scary. But do you want to know the worst part about it?

It was a Pepsi place. As in - of all 20 or so soda machines on the property? They ALL SOLD PEPSI. Do you know what that means? I went four days only drinking the Diet Coke that Brit and her husband were willing to share with me. I had to have Diet Pepsi the whole time. NO DIET COKE. I thought I was going to die. As a matter of fact? I did die. I died from Diet Coke deficiency and I am now nothing more than a Diet Pepsi hating ghost, wandering the world haunting facilities like the Hyatt in San Jose.

As many of you have read over the last few months, there has been a lot of analysis in the blogosphere of the word and the act of “Mommyblogging.” Are you a Mommyblogger? Is that a bad thing? What if you don’t write about your kids? What if someone uses it as an insult? What do you call yourself besides Hott Sexy Mama Who Blogs?

I have a short attention span and stopped caring about that debate/topic about the time I discovered that I can play games on my cell phone.

Well, I went to a Mommyblogging panel at BlogHer. The brilliant women on the panel were Mir, Sweetney, and Alice. I was really looking forward to that panel because I was hoping people would ask them the questions I wanted to hear answered.

(There was no way in hell I was going to ask because I’m a big fat chicken shit. If you doubt that? Just wait until you hear the story of The Time I Spoke To Dooce. Otherwise titled Why Am I Such A Goddamn Freak? or maybe Brit’s version titled Just Shut Up Already And Introduce Yourself to Her Because I’m Effin’ Sick Of Hearing You Talk About It. )

However, because of the recent debates over use of the word “Mommyblogger,” as well as the fact that some blogger posted an insulting post about Mommybloggers the night before the event - the panel turned out to be much more about the controversy instead of the act itself. Now - I completely understand this. Not everyone has adult onset ADD like I do and might actually not be done discussing these debates. But since I had already moved on in my head - I had some other things I wished to talk about.

SO! Without further ado - we are holding our own panel. Are you ready? I’m going to ask the questions and you’re going to respond. Either on your blog (if it inspires you to write about it) and you can leave a link. Or, just respond in the comments. I’ll post my responses and links to your entries about it later this week. Are you ready? Where’s the mic? tap, tap Is this thing on? Here we go…

1. Do your kids know about your blog? If they’re too young to know, do you plan to keep it open to them as they get older?

2a. If so - do you worry they may get embarrassed later? What would you do if they asked you to stop writing about them? What would you do if they wanted you to take it down all together?

2b. If not, what are you doing to make sure they never find it? What if they do find it?

3. Do you think our kids will appreciate the archive of their childhood? Do you wish your parents had done the same?

4. Do you go back and re-read your past parenting milestones? Do you realize you forgot a lot?

5. What about your children’s friends/teachers/moms-of-friends? What if they found your blog? Do you tell your child not to tell anyone about it or are they free to talk about it? Do you worry their teachers or other parents will think it’s weird?

Have at it!