Angela did a meme on her blog about Motherhood and technology as part of her participation in the BlogHer Momspotting project. I thought it was an interesting meme AND she’s giving away a hat to those of us who participate so…instant blog material for a Monday! CAN’T BEAT THAT! If you decide to do it too, leave your answers or a link in the comments. I’m not giving anything away but I’d love to see your answers!

1. Which expensive electronic device do you most often let your older children abuse or your baby drool on?
   Well – my kids have a lot of their own electronics that I try to encourage they use instead of ours. However, I used to sometimes let NikkiZ play games on my cellphone. BUT – since I dropped it and it became a lethal weapon, she is no longer allowed. She’s pretty good on phones though, since she has once of those leapsters, she knows a bit about handling small devices.
2. How many take-out restaurant numbers do you have programmed into your phone?
   One: Marcos. It’s a pizza place near our home that makes REALLY good pizza but it’s not quick so I’ll typically call before I leave the house so that I won’t have to wait too long when I get there.
3. How many hours of television do you so totally not let your kids watch a week?
   I don’t regulate television for my kids currently. My daughter probably watches 1-3hrs a day (I’m trying to be honest here…) and my oldest keeps his TV on all the time, so it’s hard to tell. Even if he’s not paying attention it’s on. I do NOT have a TV in my younger children’s room, however. I have this weird hangup against that until they’re much older.
4. Do you think people who say “we don’t watch television” at play dates but really mean “we just watch DVDs” are lying liars from Liarville?
   I have never had a real “playdate” – so I’m not quite familiar with this issue. HOWEVER, if I was invited to one and they Mother told me that they don’t watch TV…I would take that a little snottily I think. It would rub me the wrong way and if I then found out that DVDs were allowed? I would totally think she was from Liarville.
5. How many miles have you driven with your child and not one device of electronic entertainment in a single car trip?
   Before we had the minivan? 400 miles? Maybe? But since we got the minivan with the DVD player, any trip out of town gets a DVD played. We don’t use the DVD player in the van unless we’re going on a trip so it’s a treat of sorts.
6. What’s your record for calls to the pediatrician or Ask-a-Nurse in a single day?
   I’m not sure but I know it’s more for myself when pregnant than for any of my kids. I’m not hyper-sensitive about sickness, even with my kids. I think it’s how I was raised (never EVER going to the doctor for ANYTHING) but I have never been one to call the pediatrician. And thank GOD my kids have never been too sick. But, If they’re sick enough for me to consider a call? Then they’re sick enough to take in. And I’ve done the Emergency Room run before too in extreme situations. But typically? No calls. For me – on the other hand – when I was pregnant? I called constantly because I save up all of my medical paranoia for everyone in the family and cash it in when I’m carrying child.
7. What’s the sexiest thing your partner could text you after a hard day?
   Let’s have family movie night tonight, and YOU pick the movie!
8. What’s your favorite iPad joke?
   I like the various articles/entries I’ve seen comparing the iPad to things like rocks and stone tablets. They make me giggle.
9. What’s the dumbest parenting tool, gear, gadget or device you ever bought?
   Diaper Genie. I just had a huge issue with keeping the dirty diapers in that thing when the outside garbage is a much better place for them. We just felt really weird storing poop in the room. No matter how “clean” it smelled. And every time we opened it? GAG. So, after just a few weeks we donated it to Goodwill and started the trend of taking dirty diapers directly to the outdoor garbage. Wet ones get thrown in plastic grocery bags (reuse!) and taken out at the end of the day.
10. How many years will it take for your child to become more tech-savvy than you?
    My oldest teaches me tech stuff all the time. My youngest doesn’t know anything yet. My middle? Somewhere in between. I’m thinking by 8 or 9? If kids have access to the technology? They’ll probably have figured most of it out. My son has a friend who has even hacked her iPhone. That’s talent, right there.

Don’t you love it when you find something your toddler just loves? Like the first time I tried Criss, Cross, Applesauce on AndyZ and immediately asked for MO! MO! I’ve loved that so many people have emailed or commented about tried that on their child and being so entertained by how much they love it. Well, it occurred to me, what do YOU do that I may be missing out on? What are some of the cute little games or gestures that you do with your child that they love so much? I would love to have some new little things to introduce to my kids. I mean, you can only toss a kid in the air so many times before they start to get bored with it. Let’s face it – sometimes getting through a day with a toddler is all about variety and the little things. It’s not necessarily about big trips to the library or park. We know our kids love those big outtings. But, sometimes you just need some of those small moments to get you from hour to hour, and if you have different small moments than I do? I’d love to steal some of yours. But before you tell me some of yours, I’ll give you a few of the others we do to illicit smiles around our house. Anything to break the monotony of the endless piles of laundry I have to tackle.

• AndyZ loves butterfly kisses. You know, the one where you bat your eyelashes against their cheek? Instant giggle inducer. Often he kisses my eyes afterwards, which is so cute it makes my heart melt. He doesn’t do it every time, it’s like he saves it for when he really wants some ice cream.
• If I can’t get him to come to his room for a diaper change? I get down on all fours and offer him a ride on my back. He always obliges then. (And it’s a good workout!) Although, there is a downside to this as he likes it so much sometimes, if I’m just sitting on the floor, he tries to jump on my back for a surprise ride. This often hurts.
• Sometimes NikkiZ and AndyZ are too busy to give me kisses. When I finally get them to come to me for a kiss, I’ll zerbert their lips. They find this hysterical and often will come back for more. AndyZ even tries to do the same to me, but it often just results in me with a mouthful of spit. GLAMOROUS!
• When I drop NikkiZ off at school, sometimes I demand an upside-down kiss. This is me bending at the waist, over her head (from behind her) so that my face is upside-down from hers. Then we kiss. It’s getting harder the taller she gets (as I’m only 5′3″ on a TALL day) but she still gets a kick out of it.
• AndyZ loves, loves lotion. He calls it “Moe-Dee” for some reason. I keep a tube at the changing table and give him a skirt to keep him occupied while I change his diaper. He thinks it’s really funny when I put some on his belly.
• Sometimes I let NikkiZ wear old shirts of mine to bed. She thinks this is a really special (and funny!) treat. I did this the first time out of necessity as we had forgotten to get her PJs out of her room before he brother went to sleep. Now? It’s almost a reward.
• AndyZ also loves chapstick. But this is sometimes a BAD thing as he finds it and eats it when I’m not looking. He actually sees it somewhere now and says, “Eat Eat Chapstick?” (Which, actually sounds like, “Eat Eat Daddy?” – a completely different sentiment.) So, before you introduce this, make sure you know where all of the chapstick you own is. Chapstick poop is gross. TRUST ME ON THAT ONE.

I’ve been working on a series of posts in my head for awhile now. Things I’ve learned about being a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM) since getting laid off in August. Because I was essentially a SAHM with LilZ for the first 3 years I was in college, none of this is new or surprising. But since I have a blog now, I feel like it’s a good place to address it since so often women find themselves comparing the two. I find myself able to contribute to this comparison from a unique perspective: As someone who has done both recently. And I’d like to first address the two BIGGEST changes in my life since the layoff. They are the two things I find myself thinking about the most when comparing my life before to my life now. One is super-positive and one is super-negative. I’ll give you the full range spectrum of what the change has meant to me. The extreme HIGH to the extreme LOW.

Let’s start with the positive, shall we?

Number 1: I No Longer Feel Like I’m Half-Assing Everything

I’ve written dozens of blog entries before about how I felt like I was always half-assing everything. Here is one example. I was spreading myself so thin that I never felt like I was doing my BEST at ANYTHING. Hell, I didn’t feel like I was even doing GREAT half the time. Mostly I was just getting by. Both at work and at home.

Now? Now that my home life is my job? I feel like I’m giving so much more. I’m cooking meals for my family, I’m staying caught up with laundry. Toys are staying organized and lightbulbs actually get changed! (If a fixture had more than one bulb in it? I waited until they were all burnt out to change even one of them.) I even cleaned out from behind the dryer yesterday. And I scrubbed LilZ’s shower last week. I’m able to keep up with the clutter in the kid’s room (They share a room, the clutter becomes life threatening in 3.2 hours.) and put DVDs back on the shelf after they’ve been watched as opposed to letting them stack up next to the DVD player until they’re as tall as the TV itself. I’m making regular trips to the recycling center and to Goodwill. I’m much better about remembering things the kids need for school. (Not perfect…but much better.) I’m able to pick up and drop off when they need me to instead of when I’m able to.

There are just so many things at home that I do better than I did before. It’s amazing what this does for my self-confidence as a Mom and as a Wife. Don’t get me wrong, you can’t eat off my floors or anything…but that’s because I’ve never put cleaning to that degree as a priority. I still don’t scrub baseboards. Not because I don’t have time, but because I just don’t care. And that’s okay! Because I’m playing many more games with my kids. AndyZ has started asking for “PahTee” which means “Dance Party” – his new favorite game which simply involves us dancing like maniacs. I’m not against running errands at night like I was when I worked, so when there are last-minute things needed for home or school? I’m on it. I have not felt like I’ve half-assed hardly anything since August. And let me tell you: THIS IS A GOOD THING.

Now, for the BAD THING.

Number 2: I Know Longer Get Any Validation For My Job

Man. This job is hard. I work 60+ hours a week now doing much more physical work than when I sat at a desk. I get no days off and there is always more stuff to do. But the worst part? There is no one to validate my work. No one who notices that I’ve completed a task. When I worked in an office there were things that needed to be done. People knew when they were done because they either (a) asked for them to be done or (b) needed the product of the completed task to do their own job. There were always people who knew what I had done during my day. They didn’t necessarily praise me for it, and that’s fine, but they at least KNEW about it. I feel like no one in my family actually recognizes 99% of the shit that I get done around the house. If it’s major I’ll point it out: “Did you see? I scrubbed the baseboards in the bathroom!” And since no one really notices the work getting done, there is definitely no praise or congratulations given.

If I had worked in an office job that never had anyone recognize any of the work I had done, I think I would have quit. What’s the point in doing the work if no one notices? I know a lot of people who get bonuses or accolades or even just pats on the back in their office jobs. When you are a Stay At Home Mom? None of this happens. I do not consider this a slight on my family, I don’t think I would notice it either. It’s just part of the job, I guess. It’s definitely work you have to enjoy because the money sucks and no one is going to reward you for surviving the day your toddler decided not to nap. Do you know how hard of a day that is? The non-napping toddler day? It’s hard for two reasons: 1) You don’t get that break from hearing, “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! MOOOOOMMMMMMYYYYY!” every 1.2 seconds and 2) They turn into demons without their naps. That was yesterday. Yet I still managed not to lock anyone up in the closet. I feel like in the corporate world this would be something that would warrant a Certificate of Awesomeness, or a Mega Bonus because it’s a VERY HARD THING.

But honestly? If the kids did notice I washed and changed their bedding, or if my husband stopped to think about me dragging all of the Christmas stuff back up in the attic by myself, I’m not sure anyone would consider this anything more than just me doing my job. And while in an office environment, doing your job gives you at least a paycheck for validation, and time off and health insurance (if you’re lucky) – being a Stay At Home Mom means you do your job without recognition or compensation. And that? SUCKS GIANT DONKEY BALLS.

So, in summary: I feel better about myself as a Mom and a Wife because I feel like I’m finally able to be the Wife and Mom my family deserves. But also? None of them notice how awesome I am so sometimes I want to punch them all in the face.

The End.

Seriously woman? More of the topless monkey shoes? Stop it, already.

That’s what I’m talking about. This is how I want to be remembered. AS A STUD.