AndyZ is at that point now where he will smile or laugh at me…while he’s nursing. It’s a hard thing to explain to someone who has never witnessed it, but there is hardly anything more hysterical or adorable than a kid trying to suckle and laugh at the same time. Every time I try to describe it, it sounds like, “My son laughing with my boob in his mouth is the cutest thing evah!” And that doesn’t quite do the sweetness or the warmness associated with the moment justice. It’s just…awesome. It makes the bleeding nipples worth it. Seriously. I’m so grateful my milk supply is at least enough to sustain my child, even though it’s not enough to successfully pump. So that I can always keep the image of him laughing at my funny faces while nursing him in the back of my mind for those days when I want to tell the world to SUCK IT.

Any other nursing mother’s out there who know what I’m talking about? And possibly can describe it in a way that sounds more Maternal and Sweet? Or am I the only one in the world who has such an attachment to her kid laughing and nursing at the same time?

Thank you so much for your input here. I’m going to write more about this tomorrow after I ponder a lot of the wise things you all said. You always amaze me to be so spot on in so many ways. I already feel better about it.

To get NikkiZ to tolerate the idea of going to school all day instead of being home with me, I started out promising her that we’d do fun things after school. Art projects, trips to Target, cookies etc. This served two purposes: 1) Give her something to look forward to after school and 2) Force me to do something other than come home and do housework after cooking dinner. She has gotten so used to the idea, that when she wakes up in the morning she now says, “I want to do some-sing sun aster school!” (We don’t do the “f” sound or the “-th” sound yet.)

I promised her a trip to the park today, but we couldn’t do that until after dinner. So, while dinner was cooking, we did art on the driveway! I took the idea from my mother-in-law and we traced NikkiZ on some easel paper and then helped her color the outline in.

The masterpiece is now hanging in her bedroom and it turned out to be a project that she really got into. It also took almost no effort from me, which is my favorite kind of project. If it had somehow involved beer and donuts, I would have considered it the perfect post-school activity.

One of LilZ’s teachers did something I found odd last week. Actually, depending on when you talked to me, I may have actually been too outraged to refer to the incident using such a benign word as “odd.” It angered me to no end. It has since passed and I’ve spent a lot of time talking about it and thinking about it. I’ve come to a few conclusions about it, but I wanted to hear what you all had to say first. I’m not going to tell you what I may or may not have done in response to the situation, because I’m not sure I could explain myself well regarding such an emotional issue. I’ll wait to see what YOU have to say. I want to know what YOU would have done.

One of LilZ’s teachers (Remember - he’s in 8th grade at a public school) made everyone in the classroom take turns telling what church they went too.

Yes. What church they went to.

Now - I’ve already mentioned I was angry, but more because I feared my son would be looked down upon for my choices. But LilZ did not want me to do anything about it for fear of greater repurcusion.

So - my question: Would it have even angered you? What would you have done? How would you have discussed it with your child?

And more importantly — what do you think the teacher would have done if some kid said, “The church of SATAN.”

Goodbye maternity leave! Week 1 as a Working Away From Home And Therefore Away From My Three Evil Precious Children has gone pretty well, if I do say so myself. I thought I’d start missing my kids terribly by Wednesday…but I really didn’t. Could be because I’m a awful mother. But I’d prefer to think it’s because I’m an awesome mother who used the few hours she had with her kids each night to enjoy their company and play with them. Therefore eliminating the build-up of longing over the week.

Or I’m just a bad mother. Either way…

We tried to do something fun every night. (NikkiZ says when she goes to be now, “I want to do something SUN tomorrow!” We’re still struggling with the “fff” sound.) Whether it’s bathtime, (Which is fun to her…not to me, the one who ALWAYS ends up soaking wet. How does that happen?) or painting, or crafts…or even just an outing to Target. (NikkiZ: “I love Target.”) I tried to really make use of those hours before she went to bed. And LilZ and I tried to hang out and watch TV together a few nights after the kids were in bed. I say I did a DAMN good job this week, thank you VERY much.

What is she talking about? How is this NOT fun?

AND — I kept the laundry washed, the house clean, I cooked dinner every night, changed the kitty litter, and managed to somehow get all of us out the door relatively close to 6:20am every morning. Dressed and carrying the necessary items for school. And although LilZ doesn’t require assistance getting ready for school anymore…it does take the force of a small army to get him out of bed at 5:45am. That small army is ME yelling LOUDLY.

Essentially? I’m taking this moment to do something I rarely do. Openly brag about myself. I typically suffer from low self-esteem and guilt issues that keep me from ever complimenting myself in any way. I either don’t believe I deserve it, or I feel guilty for thinking I deserve it. (Living in my head is FUN!) But today? Damn it! I deserve it. I did great this week. Go Me!

Your turn: What is something you did this week you’re proud of? I don’t want to be the only one patting myself on the back over hear. Why don’t we all take a turn? We all deserve it!

Smiley McSmileson agrees. You deserve a pat on the back!

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*Working Away From Home Mom. “Working Mom” seems so insulting to the SAHMs of the world who - I can vouch for having been one - work WAY harder than I do at the office all day.

AndyZ is co-sleeping just like his sister did. I know that this fact is probably the main reason why he’s not yet sleeping through the night. Or even more than 3 hours at a time. Being right next to us surely makes his sleep patterns lighter so more likely that he wakes to eat periodically. Also - if he wakes even a little bit - I tend to assume he’s hungry if it’s been more than three hours since he ate. In reality? If he were NOT in bed with us? He’d probably stir a bit and go back to sleep.

But - is any of this motivating me to get him to sleep elsewhere? Like the bassinet at least? No. Because now that I’m back to work…I feel like I need that cuddle time at night even more than ever. Is that insane? I mean - he’s sleeping through most of it - why do I cherish that time so much? Why is that closeness suddenly so necessary? And since I’m practically doing this to myself - does that take away my right to bitch about being tired? Because I bitch A LOT about being tired. And I really don’t want to lose THAT either.

What? I’m supposed to be sleeping more than three hours at a time? I missed the memo.