NikkiZ was on my lap last night as I was going through my Feed Reader. She saw me stumble upon the entry from Bakerella discussing her book and she had her interest piqued. I said, “That’s the lady who does real cake pops. Not just the cheating version of Cake Poppers that Mommy does.”

“I like yours better,” she vehemently exclaimed.

The funny thing is: She probably does. She’s the pickiest eater on the planet and sweets don’t ever guarantee edibility. She wouldn’t even think about trying the Chocolate Sheet Cake from PW last night. But my cake poppers? She adores. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen her perk up at a food so much. It’s probably one of the main reasons why I make them for everything. All of the cooking I’ve learned to do in the last year, all of the yummy meals I’ve made, and the only thing she’s liked out of the new me is the Cake Poppers. So there’s a good chance, because she’s weird, that she would like mine best.

However…

I decided to explain to her about the Bakerella and how hers are like art. I opened up this page and showed NikkiZ all of the amazing creations Bakerella has done. I’ve never even been brave enough to try putting mine on sticks, much less decorate them. NikkiZ was in awe. But the funny thing is – she was trying to suppress it. Like, I’d see her initial shock over the Hello Kitty Pops and then she’d shake it off and be like, “Eh. Whatever. Yours are still better.”

At that point I was almost humored at how stubborn she was being. I was all, “Nikki! Did you SEE the Sesame Street Guys?? Those are AMAZING. How can you say mine are better?

“I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

HA! How is that for my diva/sassy daughter showing an honest-to-goodness sweet and selfless side. It was like she knew the other ones were awesome but she was afraid that acting impressed in any way would indicate an insult to my beloved Cake Poppers. I proceeded to explain to her that everyone has different talents and hobbies and it’s okay if someone’s better than me at something. I told her I’m proud of my Cake Poppers and everyone loves them but we all have to admit that they’re no where near as beautiful as the Cake Pops Bakerella makes and that’s okay. It doesn’t hurt my feelings at all!

“Well, maybe someday you can try to make some and they’ll be as pretty.” (Yeah. Because it looks just that easy.)

“Maybe,” I said, “but I think I don’t have enough patience or dexterity for that kind of detail work.”

“Yeah. That’s why you don’t like to wear makeup either.”

That’s my girl.

*****************

Unrelated to my inability to apply makeup: Huntsville brought in 400 tons of sand and hosted a Beach Party downtown to raise money for a Children’s Museum and gulf relief. We went both days and took some hysterical pictures you should check out here. I love my city.

If you’re like me, you’ve seen many of Bakerella’s Cake Pops and thought, Yeah. Sure. I could totally do that. Just as soon as I catch that pig that’s flying around my house. Then, of course, she and Pioneer Woman both tease us into thinking the impossible is indeed possible with their simplified Cake Balls. (PW Here, Bakerella Here.) Except, of course, I still knew there was no way I could make something look that pretty…ever. I have shaky hands and the patience of a 2-year old. So, as many of you have heard me mention, I have re-named the Cake Balls to Cake Poppers and suddenly…they’re achievable!

Here’s the thing: If you call them Cake Poppers? They DON’T HAVE TO BE SPHERICAL. That’s the best thing about the name change. That – and if you’re 12 like me – you can mention them without giggling. (Hee Hee…Balls.) But seriously – once you remove the need for them to be in the shape of balls? By changing the name? The pressure is gone and the precision is unnecessary. ALL HAIL SLOPPY BAKERS!

I decided to document my process, now that I’ve got it fined-tuned, to share with those of you who have been struggling with the Cake Balls before. Keep in mind, this is the EXACT SAME RECIPE as Bakerella and PW use, but with a name change to allow for my own personal imperfections. Maybe the name change is all you need, but if you need more? Here’s my sloppy and messy guide to Cake Balls Poppers: Cake Balls For The Baking Impaired!

The cast of characters. I also suggest you keep wax paper and disposable forks/spoons on hand…but neither are necessary.

Step One: Bake the cake as per the instructions on the box. While this step seems like an easy one…it has been forgotten before.

Step Two: Let the cake cool for several hours. I usually even leave mine overnight.
Step Three: Mix in one container of Cream Cheese icing with then entire baked cake.

Step Four: Now it’s time to roll them into balls poppers! Basically, I go for balls (hee.) by rolling them up in my hand, but I don’t fret about the perfection of the shape. IT DOESN’T MATTER. TIP: Keep your hands damp. After about 7 poppers, you’ll probably need to re-wet them. Not sopping, just damp. Makes it easier to keep the cake from sticking to your hands.

Step Five: Put them in the fridge and wait for at least an hour…but I usually go for two hours. Now – I consistently get at least two trays full of these things with each batch. Sometimes that’s 70, sometimes that’s 80. Once…when doing it for a bake sale? I got 90 out of one batch. And charged $1/3 Poppers. That means I made $30 for the bake sale from my one batch of Cake Poppers. Look out world…I’m gonna be RICH!

Step Six: Melt the chocolate for the coating. TIP: Get the chocolate for the fountains (I found ours at Hobby Lobby) because it coats easier than the multi-colored basic candy chocolates. The other one kind does come in cool colors, but for these babies? The milk chocolate for fountains? PERFECTION.

Now, I melt mine in 45 second increments and stir each time until it’s all the way melted. But – every bag seems to tell you something different and every microwave is different. I’ve never used an entire bag on one batch of poppers before, so you might be okay if you mess up, just don’t get any water near the stuff. Has a bad reaction and won’t coat/melt properly.

Step Seven: Coat each Popper with chocolate.

As you can see, this is where I use disposable tools. The chocolate is messy and weird to clean up since it’s desire is to be a solid and it fights with water. I coat with the spoon and then hold with the fork while the excess chocolate drips. This is the key though: THESE ARE NOT CAKE BALLS. There is no need for any technique because no one knows they’re supposed to be round. They are Poppers. Tiny bites of cake. Blobs are actually better! So, don’t fret over how yours look. TRUST ME.

As you coat, they dry pretty quickly. As a matter of fact, mine are usually starting to dry before I finish the entire tray. So…give it a few minutes when you’re done and survey your work. Add some chocolate in spots that need them…it doesn’t matter. Because the last step? The drizzle to cover all mistakes! You’ll just drizzle chocolate over all of your poppers so that any mistakes get hidden! All hail imperfections!

There you have it! How I made Cake Balls achievable even for a twitchy, shaky-handed, impatient newbie like myself! I hope you are as successful as I have been with these treasurers. They were even requested for my son’s Theatre Awards reception on Saturday. When people start specifically requesting your baked goods? You are officially AWESOME. Which I am. Because – while I may have been known to ruin WATER ONLY muffins – I have perfected the Cake Popper. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

Oh..and I forgot! My messy kitchen shot to prove my mess extends beyond the frame of the pretty pictures above!

I swear, the red does come off! Don’t panic! (That’s to reassure my husband who is hyperventilating looking at that picture.)

LilZ had a theatre event that required him to sign up for me to provide baked goods. Of course he chose his fave: cake poppers. I knew I’d need two batches, one for Monday and one for Tuesday evening. However, the driving and chaos of the previous week had me doing my usual procrastinating and I found myself just cooking the first cake Sunday night. The cake has to cool completely before you make the poppers so I knew I’d have to make them early Monday to get the first batch done by the time of the performance. Well…little did I know that LilZ roped his friend who is staying with us for the week into helping him at the event. This meant she needed baked goods so he signed her up for Rice Krispy treats with the good intentions of making them for her since he convinced her to help him. Can you guess what happened next? He forgot until Sunday night. He begged me to help so I spent all day Monday doing goodies for this event and OH MY GOD. I am so proud of myself. SERIOUSLY. Do you see these things? The labels? The bags? The yumminess? Yes. This post serves no other purpose but to show off HOW AWESOME I AM.

(I am aware that many of you do this type of thing several times a week. Humor me as I praise myself since I never do this stuff EVER. Thanks.)

I read something this week where someone complained about the perfection of the photos of other blogger’s lives that document their baking beauties and their crafting creations. I subscribe to a lot of blogs that do the same thing and I find myself jealous and insecure looking at their photos in their perfect kitchens in their fancy homes. I do NOT want you make the mistake of thinking I might come even close to being that cool. Nothing I do is ever as pretty as my photos look. My house is always a disaster millimeters out of the focus and I intentionally choose photos to show you that don’t spotlight the cat puke on my carpet or the diet coke cans on my counters. So…here is a glimpse of what my kitchen looked like during BakeFest 2010.

These towels stayed on the floor all day, I just slid them around the cover up the newest spill.

I assure you my messes would be worse if I didn’t have the luxury of dogs to eat all of my crumbs and splatters.

What? Should I not admit that out loud?

LilZ reported back that the cake poppers went too fast to even document. They were gone in MILLISECONDS. I wear that like a badge of honor bestowed upon the bravest heroes. It’s a lot for a newbie in the kitchen, you know. If only I could bask in the glory of my achievements instead of doing it all again for tomorrow.

*Sigh*

My brain is mush thanks to many factors (allergies, excess driving, allergies, lack of sleep, allergies, cake poppers, and allergies) so I think I’m better doing another BULLET entry instead of trying to compose a coherent one using…paragraphs. Eh. Too much work.

• I went to Knoxville on Thursday and discovered that I only thought I was suffering from bizarre seasonal allergies. Once I crossed the city limits? I stopped breathing. Since then I’ve learned that Knoxville is the Allergy Capital this season. I was so miserable I accepted medicine from a stranger in the surgery waiting room. Luckily that medicine worked and has helped me stay alive the last few days. (ALAVERT!) I also started using eyedrops and felt great until yesterday’s trip to Knoxville. I’m hoping today gets me back to a medicated normal, but yesterday really killed me. Knoxville? I WANT TO PUNCH YOU AND YOUR POLLEN LEVELS IN THE FACE.
• Mom’s surgery went well. They couldn’t remove the tumor laparoscopicly because it had grown a bit into her bladder and part of that had to be removed as well. She’s still in the hospital (hence my trip yesterday) but doing okay…considering. I need to go back again in the next day or two but after yesterday’s allergy attack I’m feeling a big ragged so I may need to take more than just a day off from driving.
• MrZ did some home repairs this weekend to start the journey toward GETTING THE HOUSE READY TO SELL. Anyone got any tips they want to share on important things to consider? I think we’re going to rent some sort of storage to keep a lot of the clutter since this house is a bit too small for five people and we hear storage boxes in every room is NOT a great selling point. Beyond getting our excess crap out to make it look bigger, what other things should we be thinking about?
• The chaos of my life has had me cut out a lot of TV that I used to watch. I also haven’t been able to try a lot of the shows I’ve been wishing I could try. I’m still obsessing over Modern Family and Cougar Town of course, but I’ve given up Flash Forward, V, Human Target, Supernatural, and a few others I can’t recall at the moment. I’m watching Dancing With The Stars in FF mode which means I only watch the dances that contain people I’m interested in (NOT The Bachelor) and I’m not watching any of the critiquing or training. Except for Kate Gosselin’s segments. I never watched her show and don’t know much about her but her partner Tony Dovolani has long been one of my favorites because he seems to really be able to help anyone. I am obviously on his side in any argument because he has my loyalty since I don’t know much about her. BUT – in HER defense (since I don’t know anything about her) – I am an awful student. Granted, that’s why I wouldn’t let anyone film me doing something like this. I wouldn’t want my immaturity documented. But I feel like I would be acting in much the same horribly bitchy way. And I would probably not dance any better. While I do have rhythm (something I’m not sure Kate has) I do NOT have any grace. So – I can’t be too hard on her.
• When I read L. J. Smith’s Night World series awhile back (it’s another Young Adult Fantasy series) – I “knew” the last book would come out this month. Well, it turns out it does NOT. The best I can find is “Summer 2010.” I guess she changed the date since I looked last; because Amazon used to say April. This devastates me because I’m used to BIG SERIES RELEASES like Harry Potter and Twilight where you can count on release dates. If Meyer or Rowling had changed a solid release date for any of their books? There would have been bigger stories about it. *sigh* I’m obviously quite spoiled.
• I keep having to “MARK AS READ” huge chunks of blog entries in my feed reader and I’m still feeling horrible about it. First it was Seussical, now it’s traveling for my Mom, I’m longing for the day when I can catch up on all of my blog reading casually and maybe even, you know, comment! I have so much to say! I did squeeze in a comment with Michelle echoing her hatred of the Target double carts. My Publix has the BEST double carts (notice I’m not saying “Buggy” – it’s my gift to you non-southerners) EVER.
  

  All hail functional and entertaining double carts! That one even has TWO layers of cart so that you can pack in almost as much food but in a cart almost the same size as the others. LOVE IT.

• Wow. Did I just get that excited over a well-designed two-seater grocery cart? I’m LAME.
• LilZ had his cast party this weekend and I made cake poppers again. It reminded me that several of you mentioned difficulty with the coating part. First of all, that’s why I prefer “Poppers” to “Balls” – no one knows they’re supposed to be spherical! Just coat the heck out of them, who cares if the chocolate pools around the bottom? Also – I used the chocolate designed for chocolate fountains (found at Hobby Lobby). When I switched it up and used the regular candy coating chocolates? I realized that stuff was much harder to work with. Finally, make sure the Cake Poppers have been in the refrigerator for an hour before you try to coat them. They handle better cold and firm. Just some tips to make Cake Poppers easier! From the person who screws up WATER ONLY muffins!

So…what’s going on with you?

In 1998 I graduated with my first Bachelor’s degree in Biology with a minor in Geography. I went back the following semester to get another Bachelor’s in Professional Geography because while working on my minor I discovered the field of GIS (Geographic Information Systems) and fell in love. The second degree allowed me to geek out on maps, cartography, and geographic data and the spatial relationships it creates. Most Fun Degree EVER. I got a job in that field for a few years (a field MrZ still works in) and then ended up at a job with a small company where I did more work relating to websites and marketing. This boring introduction is just a basis for the information I’m about to share with you:

I’m going to try to get my MBA.

Holy SHIT. I just said that out loud.

I became fascinated by marketing and business working in such a small company that required me to do all sorts of odd jobs. While working there I even started discussing getting my MBA and now – MrZ and I have decided to bite the bullet, trim the fat in the budget, and just let me focus on getting my Master’s as quick as possible. Holy SHIT.

(I’ll be saying that a lot. While I don’t curse often, evidently fear of education and my future will inspire a bit of mild vulgarity.)

I sent out inquiries yesterday and learned that the biggest thing in my way to getting accepted into our local MBA program, is my undergraduate GPA. I like to blame the under 3.0 GPA (I won’t tell how far under) on being a single working Mom trying to make it through college. But in reality it was because my school had an attendance policy and I failed a few classes for missing too many. Aren’t I a good role model? Evidently getting “F”s can really damper your GPA. Who knew?

So – in order for me to feel more confident about my acceptance into the program – I have to do well on the GMAT. I have to get a minimum of 500 to be considered and to make up for my GPA I really need to get above a 600. And let me tell you the key point: I SUCK AT STANDARDIZED TESTING. I was the one in high school with the really good grades but the really crappy ACT and SAT scores. I was in the National Honor Society but only testing average everywhere else. So the idea of my future hanging on the thread of this ONE TEST. Makes me want to VOMIT.

I’m staring an 80-day study program today. I’ve bought a few books and I’ll probably buy a few more. I’m going to really focus on trying to do as well on this test as humanly possible so that maybe I can get an average score.

So…another chapter in my life. HOPEFULLY. If I go through all of this emotional stress and grief and then don’t get accepted? There will be a dozen donuts making a sacrifice for the sake of my wounded ego. I guarantee you that.

And in non-related St. Patrick’s Day news…We made green cake poppers this weekend!

They were good but I learned that I think the reason I’ve had an easier time than many of you is because with the chocolate/red velvet cake poppers, I was using the kind of melting chocolate they use in chocolate fountains. Very liquid-y and easy to work with. The yellow and white melting chocolates I got this weekend are for candies and it was really thick and not as easy to use. Either way – they turned out so good we have none leftover for St. Patrick’s Day. Or for pictures. Just trust us.