I’ve read quite a few of sad posts in the last few days. Sad news, sad moods, sad, sad, sad. It’s that time of year – The holidays are passed, cold has come, the noses are running and the skies are gray. And then, it just seems, bad new abounds. Layoffs, illness, and tragically I’ve read about several too-soon deaths. My friends are sad and there’s nothing I can do or say to really make it better for anyone.

So…I’m going to put up a funny picture. It probably won’t make the stress or hurt or anxiety go away, but if you’re feeling down? Maybe it will make you smile.

When Sunflower wants attention? She just takes it. Whether you’re awake or not.

Thanks to all of you for your wonderful comments and sympathies yesterday. MrZ stayed home all day and said he refreshed the comments of that post about once an hour to read what everyone was saying. They meant more to both of us than you can possibly know. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Cisco went peacefully and we consider ourselves blessed to have had 10 great years with him.

Now. Enough with the tears! Let’s move on to things that make us smile like 3-year olds with first-time bangs and first-time painted fingernails!

The bangs were not very even thanks to a certain girl’s inability to site still and uncanny ability to wiggle as the scissors closed. I fixed it a bit, but still not perfect. Either way – DAMN CUTE. And I painted her nails for the first time as well. It’s like in the span of one day she went from 3 to 13 and I’m now watching her pin up pictures of teen heartthrobs to her wall while wailing about the tragedy of me not allowing her to go roller skating with her friends.

Maybe my imaginary teenage girl scenario needs a little updating?

Anyway. That’s our Big News of the week. We now have bangs. After months of failed pullback attempts with the hair (she has some sort of compulsion to remove everything in her hair after a few hours at school) and annoyance on our part and her teacher’s – we decided to give her bangs. And while I may regret it someday when we try to grow them out, we’re already seeing the advantages. The nervous-tick like habit of pushing the hair out of her eyes? Gone. Hairclips being lost at school? Not anymore. Clumps of oatmeal in the hear that ends up in her mouth while she eats? That’s the thing I was the happiest to see go. Oatmeal does not come out of hair easily.

At 3 she finally received her first real haircut. And at $10? It will be a long time before she gets another. Because – seriously? $10 to cut that little hair? Either I’m a cheap (which is a distinct possibility since I hate paying $15 for my trims) or that seems pricey for a child’s cut. I swear we only paid $5 for them growing up. Of course, that was back in the old days with the VCRs and the Cassette players. I’m hoping first thing on Obama’s agenda is to introduce tax incentives to hair salons with discounted prices. That’s way more important than the climate, the wars, or the economy. Don’t you think?

Cisco at a healthier time

“Is he scared?”

That has always been the question asked by people who first meet Cisco. We always say the same thing, “No. He just has a nervous condition.”

From an early age Cisco started getting the shakes. It is one of the things that always made people fall in love with him because you couldn’t help but want to snuggle with him to make him feel safe, even after you were told he wasn’t scared. He is also the only dog we have that doesn’t insist upon jumping on everyone that walks in our house. He just patiently waits for you to make your way in, and then he waits for you to come to him. Because he knows you will. Everyone does.

This is why he’s always their favorite. It doesn’t matter who “they” are.

We don’t have favorites, of course. We love all of our dogs equally.

But if we had a favorite? It would be Cisco.

Donnie and Cisco have been together longer. Almost 10 years now. Because Donnie brought Cisco home, someone brought Lil’Girl to him months later as a stray. And they would have a litter of puppies together that would give the extended family Daisy and Rosco who would go to live with MrZ’s parents. Essentially, when Donnie brought home Cisco? He paved the way for three other dogs to enter our family. He is the patriarch of the Bostons in our lives. Hell – he’s the patriarch of our cats too.

Cisco doesn’t like it when people hug. I’m not sure why. He doesn’t like dancing either. Or when we do workout videos. I’m the most thankful for that last one. Always gave me a good excuse to opt out.

Cisco’s tongue is larger than normal and his teeth are too small. This means his tongue is always hanging out of his mouth just a little bit. Cutest. Thing. Ever. Trust me.

Cisco loves to hang out at my feet at the desk. He also like to cuddle under blankets and tables. I think he chooses the shelter to protect him from the crazy female canines he’s forced to live with. They don’t do much to help a guy relax, that’s for sure.

We’re taking Cisco in today. I can’t even say what we’re taking him in to do. But we’re doing it. And we’re going to stay there with him until he’s gone. We owe him that. This last weekend has been perfect. Well, as perfect as it could be with a dog whose body is shutting down under the weight of cancer. But he’s been in good spirits and allowed us to pamper him and snuggle with him and spoil him. I’m glad we had this weekend. Monday, he took a turn for the worse which is fate’s way of letting us know we’re making the right decision.

We’re going to miss him terribly. I cry as I write this. I don’t want to think of not seeing him when I wake up every morning. I don’t want to think of times on the couch without him at the crook of my legs. I don’t want to think about him not being here to bark at visitors and dancers alike.

I’ve always been the most intrigued by Eastern religions when it comes to the afterlife. I’m not a subscriber to the pearly gates of heaven, but I seem to be able to most wrap my mind around someone’s soul or consciousness, moving to a higher state of existence if they’ve reached their potential in a previous life. I really like that idea with Cisco. I want to imagine him continuing his journey elsewhere. I can’t imagine him gone for good. I don’t want to.

I guess if you’ve never lost a pet, or never been close to an animal, this may seem a little extreme to you. But for those of you who have dogs at home who run to the door to greet you when they hear your keys, or who lick your face and chew your shoes. Will you give them an extra big treat tonight? In memory of Cisco? Thanks.

Cisco with a much younger NikkiZ

Cisco is not sick in this picture, LilGirl was just always such a good wife cleaning his ears when he needed it. I do not follow her example with MrZ.

Cisco is the best dog in the world to snuggle with

Four years ago. We both look so young.

Speaking of looking young…

The huge tongue is a Cisco trademark.

Even riddled with cancer, the tongue is still prominent. Nothing will stop the tongue. Cisco is the dog LilZ’s known the longest and the first pet he’s had to lose. His heart breaks too.

I don’t think NikkiZ will remember Cisco, but I know for sure AndyZ won’t. This makes me saddest of all.

She gave him extra love this weekend too. Even though she pretty much can’t stand any animal that even so much as looks at her.

Another one from four years ago. And probably the image that will linger with me whenever I think of Cisco because this was the trick we used the most when showing him off.

Daddy will miss him the most. He will always be his first child. The two of them only had each other for quite some time, until Lil’Girl and some girl named Zoot entered their lives.

We love you, Cisco.

We got the lab results back tonight for Cisco. It’s cancer. It’s fast-acting, fast-killing cancer. He’s gone from relatively healthy (Cisco has always had his share of problems) to full-system meltdown in just barely a week it seems. We brought him home tonight and he’ll stay with us through the weekend. The vet barely even offered treatment because of Cisco’s age. Our vet – who is near and dear to us – had a Boston Terrier he had to put to sleep last week because of the same cancer. So we trust him when he says that Cisco is not a good candidate for treatment. We know he’s not anyway.

So, we’ll spend the weekend with him. And Monday, I guess, depending on how he’s doing, we’ll take him to the vet for the last time. He’s so pitiful and sick, but he’s still Cisco so we’ll spend the next few days trying to say goodbye.

Something that has surprised me during this transition of me into a Stay-At-Home Mom is watching my pets also transition. The oddest change, has been how the animals are adjusting to having a toddler around all the time. NikkiZ has always liked the cats more than the dogs (they’re not as licky) but lately, all of the animals seem to want to hang out with her. If you’ll notice, it seems that Sunflower pops up in a lot more of our pictures lately. It’s like she is always hovering around NikkiZ, waiting for some love. NikkiZ, if she notices sunflower, will try to love on her a bit. It seems that Sunflower actually likes her form of love. The aggressive, sticky sort of love that only a toddler can offer.

NikkiZ would still like everyone to know that she still does not approve of dog kisses. She doesn’t mind the occasional snuggle, but the second that tongue comes out, she runs for the hills.